Coach/Quotes

A list of Coach's Quotes heard so far in Left 4 Dead 2.

Intro

 * [Reading CEDA's instructons in Zombie Survival Guide trailer] "Report unusual behavior. Barricade your homes. Avoid all contact with infected individuals. Wait for official instructions. Tch! Wait my ass!"
 * Ellis: Kill all sons-a-bitches. That's my 'fficial instructions.


 * [Killing an Infected at Whispering Oaks] "This used to be a nice neighborhood!"
 * [Stopping for a break at a stairwell in The Vannah] "Who the hell...puts an evac station...up thirty flights of goddamn stairs...?"
 * Nick: "Come on, Coach... Maybe the helicopter... maybe it's made of chocolate…"
 * [Looking at the fleeing helicopters on the hotel roof] "Thought they were supposed to be savin' our asses?"
 * Nick: "Looks like there's been a change of plans."
 * [Using a chainsaw to free Ellis from a Smoker and some Common Infected] "Goddammit! EAT THAT SHIT!"
 * [tossing a gascan at the Infected at the Peach Bowl] "Yeah!"

General

 * "Alright, let's put on our game faces. They're comin'!"
 * "God dammit, I knew I shoulda lost some weight."
 * "Alright everybody, you are giving 110%."
 * "Man, this is about to get all Baghdad and shit..."
 * "That was some epic shit right there."

Commands
These are derived from the PC commands when using the Z, X, or C keys.

Yes

 * "Fo' sure."
 * "Sho sho."
 * "Yes."
 * "Yeah."
 * "Know that's right."
 * "Positively."

Unused

 * "Yeah. Sho you right."
 * "That's what's up, baby."

No

 * "No."
 * "No!"
 * "N-O. NO."
 * "Shit naw!"
 * "Oh hell no."
 * "Excuse me?"
 * "No thank you."
 * "Nope."
 * "Uh uh."
 * "Ain't gonna happen."
 * "Hell no."
 * "You crazy?"
 * (To Ellis) "Ahhh hell no, boy."
 * (To Rochelle) "Nahh, girl. Mn. Mnnn."

Look

 * "Check this shit out!"
 * "Look at this."
 * "What do y'all make of this?"
 * "Look!"
 * "Over there!"

Argh

 * "Oh, shit."
 * "Damn!"
 * "Hell no!"
 * "Goddammit!"
 * "What the f—"
 * "Nnnnhhhhh!"

Taunt

 * "Ahhhhh! HAHAHA! Oh hell yeah!"
 * (Laughs) "Goddamn right!"
 * "How'd ya like me now, hmph!"

Follow Me

 * "C'mon let's go damnit!"

Lead the Way

 * "C'mon let's go!"

Ready

 * "Good to go."

Thank you

 * "Thanks."

Good Job

 * "Nice."
 * "Nice work."
 * "Allright, doin' good."
 * (laughter) "Burn that shit!"
 * "Way to go!"
 * "Allright, allright, not bad, not bad!"
 * "You on it!"
 * "Ooh, hoo hoo, all right!"
 * "Dang, good one!"

Seeing a survivor team-killing another survivor

 * "Whoa, that there's some screwed up shit!"
 * "You gotta watch where you aimin' that thing!"
 * "Man, are you wrong in the head shootin like that?!"
 * "What the hell are you on shootin' like that?"
 * "What the ef?! Don't be doin that!"
 * "Hey! Don't be doin' that."
 * "You try that shit on me and you'll be wishin' your momma never met ya father."
 * "Keep goin' at em like that and you gonna be the last man on earth."

General negative reactions

 * "Shit."
 * "What the f-"
 * "Damn!"
 * "Man, this is about to get all Baghdad and shit.."
 * "Oh hell, this about to get bad."
 * "Hell no."
 * "Nhhhhhh."
 * "God damn it!"
 * "Shiiit."
 * "What the?"
 * "Bullshit."
 * "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle."
 * "Goddamn!"
 * "Son of a bitch."

Survivors get separated

 * [When no other survivor is in the approximate area] "Where you all at?"
 * "Hey! Anyone out there?"
 * "Holler back at me, folks!"
 * [When two or three survivors meet up] "I'm here!"
 * "Hello!"
 * "Hey, I'm here!"
 * [When the four survivors are together again] "All right. We're all here!"
 * "We're all here!"

When there are only two survivors Left

 * "Stay close, we're a party of two."
 * "We can do this, man, we can do this."
 * "Ooooh! We gotta pull our shit together."
 * "Shit! It's just you and me! Hang tough."
 * "Shit! Just us two left. Stay close!"
 * "Ain't no one else but you and me left."
 * "Damn. This here is all we got."

Taking friendly fire

 * "Ahhh, hell no, boy, don't you be shootin' me."
 * "Excuse me? EXCUSE ME?!?!"
 * "Where in the hell ya think you're shootin'?"
 * "Watch where you're shooting!"
 * "Cut that shit out!"
 * "I swear to God you can't shoot worth shit."
 * "There's gonna be some biblical shit happening to you if you do that again."
 * "Shoot me again, and you gonna be meetin' your maker right soon."
 * "Let's not all start shootin' each other now."
 * "Young'un, stop that shit."
 * "Man, I swear to God you can't shoot worth shit."
 * "Damn it, that hurt!"
 * "Shootin' me? That's some crazy shit."
 * "You do know you shootin' me right?"
 * "Look, try shootin' some damn zombies instead of me."
 * "Are you outta your mind shootin' at me?"
 * "Will you cut that shit out?"
 * "Yo! Stop shooting me, all right?"
 * "Y'all gotta stop shootin' me."
 * "GODDAMNIT STOP SHOOTIN' ME!"
 * "Ah hell no! Do not shoot me."
 * "Come on now, seriously."
 * "Stop shooting me."
 * "Don't be shooting me."
 * "You are shooting me!"
 * "That's some bullshit!"
 * "Do that again and I'll come back on you."
 * "You shot me!"
 * "Man, you shot me?"
 * "Boy, quit pointing that thing my way."
 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "Y'all need to focus!"
 * "Listen, y'all, we need to pull together as a team."
 * "Now come on now, let's put some effort into this."
 * "I'm trying to tell you, shooting each other is not helping each other."
 * "Work as a team, people, work as a team."
 * "Y'all shootin' me."
 * "Let's not be shootin' each other, people."
 * "Come'on, y'all - none of that."
 * "Come on now, seriously."
 * "STOP! I am getting pissed off!"
 * [To Nick] "Nicolas, I thought you knew how to use a gun."
 * "Nick! You shot me!"
 * "Hey Nick, that was my ass you shot."
 * "Quit shootin' me, Nick."
 * [To Ellis] "Ellis, settle down, boy. Ya shot me."
 * "Ellis! I'll take that gun away from ya!"
 * "Ellis, you are shooting me!"
 * "Ellis, damn it, you shot me!"
 * [To Rochelle] "Ro! Quit shootin' me."
 * "Rochelle, girl, you shot me."
 * "Ro! What's gotten into you, girl?"
 * "Ro! You know damn well better than that."
 * "Little sister, you gotta learn to shoot."
 * "Girl, you gotta learn to shoot."
 * [During a Tank fight] "Don't shoot ME! Shoot the Tank!"
 * "Not me, Ellis! Shoot the Tank!"
 * "Shoot the TANK, Ro!"
 * "Shoot the TANK, Nick!"
 * "Do I look like a ten-foot-tall monster?"
 * "Hey! Shoot the Tank!"
 * "Aggghh! The TANK!"

When low on health

 * "This here is some serious bullshit."
 * "This ain't how i thought this would go."
 * "I can walk this shit off."
 * "Damn, they messed me up."
 * "I'm goin' as fast as I can."
 * "Man, this shit hurts."
 * "Man said there was nothing to worry about. Well, bullshit."
 * "Ya'll crazy if you don't think this hurts."
 * "Shit, I'm messed up."
 * "It hurts, but ain't nothin'."
 * "This shit ain't pretty."
 * "Ahh, damn it."
 * "Man, this right here hurts somethin' fierce."
 * "This is some outrageous shit."
 * "Crazy sons of a bitches messed me up."
 * "Damn. They beat me good."
 * "They beat my ass fair and square."
 * "I shoulda learned to drive a tank or some shit."
 * "Ahh, damn it now."
 * "No pain, no gain. I must be about to gain some serious shit."
 * "I ain't ready to lay down yet."
 * "Hey. Now this here is some bullshit."
 * "I can walk this off."
 * "Tryin' to walk this off."
 * "Goin' as fast as I can."
 * "I'm gonna get right."
 * "I ain't dead yet."
 * "I need to get right."
 * "Sheeeeeet, I ain't gonna make it."

When another survivor is low on health

 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "This would be the time to heal up."
 * "Now's a good time to heal if you can."
 * "If you got a health kit you should use it."
 * [When most survivors are low on health] "We oughta heal up while it's quiet."
 * "Heal if ya got em."
 * "This ain't about me, people. Let's heal up."
 * [To Ellis] "Ellis, time for you to heal, boy."
 * "All right Ellis, come on now, get yourself right."
 * "Hey Ellis, that health kit ain't gonna use itself."
 * [To Nick] "Nick, don't be stupid, heal up."
 * "Nicolas, I think it is time for you to heal."
 * "Nick, you should use that kit on yourself."
 * "Nick, it's all right, we all gotta heal sometime."
 * [To Rochelle] "Ro, time to heal."
 * "Ro, heal up, hear me, girl?"
 * "Girl, time for you to heal up."
 * "Hey girl, why don't you heal up?"

Low on health while the other survivors are in the saferoom

 * "I hear ya! I'm movin'."
 * "Can't go no faster."
 * "I'm just gonna admit it, I need some help."
 * "I'm hurt too bad to go any faster."

The survivors barely make it to the saferoom

 * "That shit was crazy."
 * "That was some close-ass shit."
 * "We just made that."
 * "I was bettin' on the other guys."
 * "Man said, any fight you walk away from is a win."
 * "Let's put it behind us. We good, we good."
 * "Touchdown!"
 * "They played us tough."
 * "That was some epic shit right there."
 * "All right. We all right, y'all. We made it."

Coach and only one other survivor make it to the saferoom

 * "That shit was too goddamn close."
 * "We almost didn't make it."
 * "That was a little too close."
 * "Damn. I can't be all that's left."
 * "We got sloppy out there."
 * "I know we can do better than that."
 * "Man. That got bad."

When revived by a survivor who asks if Coach is going to be OK

 * "I'm cool."
 * "It's all good."
 * "Hell yeah it hurts."
 * "Yeah it hurts."
 * "I'm good, I'm good."
 * "What in the hell do you think?"
 * "Ohhh shit."
 * "Hook me up."
 * "Hurry it up."
 * "They better name a school after me for this shit."
 * "Help me up and I can walk this off."
 * "Ain't gonna be nothing left of me."
 * [after other survivor's response] "I'm just screwin with ya."
 * "I see ya looking at my shoes."
 * "What ya tellin me, man?"
 * "I've been worse."
 * "Whata you mean?"
 * "I'm okay."
 * "Ain't nothin'."
 * "I can walk it off."
 * "Okay."
 * "Good enough."
 * "Just get me up."
 * "Man, been better, been better."
 * "Can't lie, been better."
 * "Damn, this shit hurts."
 * "Don't like bein' on the ground."
 * "I'm hurtin down here."
 * "Well I ain't on my back for nothin'."
 * "Man, how the hell you think I'm doin'?"
 * "I'm fine, but let's not waste time chit-chattin'."
 * "I'm good."
 * "I'll live...most likely."
 * "Tell you what, ain't my best day."

When defibing someone

 * "C'mon, C'MON!"
 * "Clear!"
 * "Don't you die on me..."

Being revived with the Defibrillator

 * "Agggh damn it! You're SHOCKIN' me!"
 * "Aw hell, I'm back here."
 * "Please tell me you didn't do mouth to mouth..."
 * "Glad I didn't go toward the light."
 * [If revived by Rochelle] "Girl, you're electric."

Seeing or picking up Pills

 * [Seeing] "Pills here!"
 * "We got pills!"
 * "Anyone need some pills?"
 * [Picking up] "Damn right. Gonna take everything I can."
 * "This shit'll help."
 * "I'm grabbing pills."
 * "I know one thing, I'm grabbing pills."
 * "I got the pills!"

Seeing or picking up Adrenaline

 * [Seeing] "Adrenaline shot here!"
 * [Picking up] "Grabbin' a shot!"

Giving pain pills

 * "Take it. Hell, I don't need it."
 * "You make sure you use this now."
 * "Ain't no shame in gettin' some help."
 * "Take this."
 * "Here ya go."

While incapacitated

 * "I need some help!"
 * "Help!"
 * "Hey, y'all, I need some help."
 * "Could use some help over here."
 * "Get ya ass over here and help me!"

Reviving someone

 * [When in the middle of an infected area] "Come on now! Get ya ass up."
 * "We ain't got time for this, get up."
 * "Let's get you ass up."
 * "Oh shit, come on, get up."
 * "Come on now, ain't got time for this, get up."
 * "Get your ass up! Get up!"
 * "Get up! Come on now. Get. Up!"
 * [When in the middle of a infected-free area] "Don't mean to be pickin on ya, but y'all look like shit."
 * "What we got here? Ain't nothin'. Ya good."
 * "You ain't right, but let's get ya up and movin'."
 * "Let's get ya up and take a look at ya. Yeah, yeah, you good."
 * "Damn, they beat ya ass good didn't they? I get ya up though."
 * "You for real? You gonna stay down with a little scratch like that? Get up!"
 * "Let's get ya ass up, a little nick ain't no reason to give up."
 * "Come on, man, don't shit yourself over this. You gonna be okay. Let me get ya up."
 * "Down and give me 20. Just foolin', let's get ya back up on your feet."
 * [Asking the downed survivor how they're doing] "Where that put you at?"
 * "They put a hurtin on ya."
 * "What we got here?"
 * "No time to be gentle. Let's get you up on your feet."
 * "Come on now, what you goin' on about? You're gonna make it. Let's get you up."
 * "You dead?"
 * "You good?"
 * "Gonna lay there all day?"
 * "So what happened?"
 * "They end you?"
 * "This it for you?"
 * "You right?"
 * "You wanna stay down?"
 * "You okay?"
 * "You gonna make it?"
 * "Everything okay?"
 * "How you feel?"
 * "You straight?"
 * "What we got here?"
 * "Talk to me. You cool?"
 * "You all right?"
 * [After other survivor responded] "All right, good."
 * "Walk it off."
 * "You okay."
 * "You look good."
 * "Come on now."
 * "Now you're back in business."
 * "Up we go."
 * "You good."
 * "You're doin' fine."
 * "This don't look bad."
 * "Can't lose you now, can we?"
 * "See you're gonna make it."
 * "Told ya. Wasn't nothing."
 * "All right, let's finish what we started."
 * "All right now, we're back in business."
 * [Reviving Ellis] "Let's go, Ellis."
 * [Reviving Nick] "Back at 'em, Nick."
 * [Reviving Rochelle] "Can't lose my favorite girl."
 * [If the survivor went down because of Coach's friendly fire] "If this had anything to do with me, I do apologize. Let's get you back up."
 * "Ah hell, I'm sorry. Ain't used to all this shootin and runnin' around."
 * "Ah hell, I'm sorry. Ain't used to all this shootin and runnin' around. At least not the runnin' around."

Reviving someone on their last down

 * "You might want to make your peace. You hurt bad. One more time and that is it for ya."
 * "They keep jumpin your shit and you keep goin' down. One more time and that's it."
 * "You gonna be okay... Ah nah, nah, I can't lie to ya. Go down again and that's it for ya."
 * "You look like one of those dudes in a drivin' school film. This may be it for ya."
 * "I ain't clownin' when I say this, but you better not go down again, cause that be it for ya."
 * "I gotta be straight with ya. You gonna die if you go down again, you understand?"
 * "You gonna want to make peace, my man. You go down again and you ain't gettin' back up."

When healing another Survivor

 * "Stop squirmin', I'm gonna heal ya."
 * "Hold up, I'm gonna heal your ass."
 * "Hold up now, I'll fix ya."
 * "Shit, they beat ya good, let me heal ya'll."
 * "Quit fussin', I'll heal ya."
 * "God damn it, quit fussin' and let me heal ya."
 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "All right, hang on, this might sting a bit."
 * "Quit squirming, or I might mess this up."
 * "Stand still now, 'cause I ain't used to doin' this."
 * "I hope this makes you feel better. Ain't sure what I'm doin'."
 * [Healing another survivor while in combat] "Hold on! Hold on!"
 * "Let me heal your shit."
 * "Let me heal ya now."
 * "Lemme heal ya!"
 * "Hold up, I'll fix ya."
 * "Stand still, I'm healin' ya!"
 * "Young'un, keep shootin' while I do this."

Rochelle dies

 * "Ahh, baby girl, goodbye."
 * "Oh Ro, oh Ro, man..."
 * "Ahh, baby girl, mmm."
 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "Gentlemen, we just lost the best thing in our little group."
 * "Damn. Baby, I should have tried to protect you more."

Ellis dies

 * "Boy, I'm going to miss your goofy ass."
 * "Bye, Ellis."
 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "Ahh damn it, I can't take losing anymore people."
 * "Little man, we are goin' to miss you."

Nick dies

 * "Nick, you gonna be missed."
 * "Bye, Nick."
 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "Nick, we're gonna miss your gun."
 * "Damn. Nick, this just got a whole lot harder."

While healing himself

 * "Hold on, y'all, I gotta heal."
 * "Cover me for a sec, I gotta heal."
 * "Hold up, healin'."
 * "Hey man, hold up - healin'."
 * "Healing! Hold on a sec."
 * "Give me a minute, gotta heal."
 * "Shit, gotta heal my ass."
 * "Hold on, y'all, I'm healing."
 * [Only in the beginning of Dead Center] "Hold up, gotta try and heal myself."
 * "Wait up, gonna try and use this thing."
 * "Man, no idea how this thing works."
 * "Hold up, gotta try and heal myself."
 * Ellis: "Oh, now, Coach, you look like you've done this before."
 * Coach: "I ain't never done this before." / "Hell, no, I ain't never done this before."

Inside the Rescue Closet

 * "Hey y'all I need some help in here!"
 * "I'm trapped in here."
 * "Anyone out there? I could use some help!"
 * "Come on, people, let me out of here!"
 * "Hellooo! Anyone out there?"
 * "Y'all ain't thinkin of leavin' me behind are ya?"
 * "Need some help, can't get myself out of here."
 * "Can anyone hear me?"
 * "I need some help in here!"
 * "Come on, y'all, I need to get out of here."
 * "Hey, y'all, we're a team! Come get me!"
 * "Ain't none of my business what y'all doin' out there. But get me when you're done."
 * "Holler back at me when you're ready to get me."
 * "Can y'all hear me? I'm trapped in here!"
 * "Hey, I'm too big of a man for this little closet!"
 * "Never had no call to ask for help before, but I do now. Help!"

When hanging off a ledge

 * [When Coach just started hanging] "Ahh shit, need a hand."
 * "This is screwed up, y'all. I need some help."
 * "Shit, I f'd this up, can you help me out?"
 * "Hey, y'all, I fell off the damn ledge."
 * [Starting to have trouble hanging] "God damn it, I knew I shoulda lost some weight."
 * "Man, shit's gettin' old, help!"
 * "Look, somebody wanna pull me up?"
 * "Hey! I'm still hanging here!"
 * [About to fall] "All right, SHIT...I'M GONNA FALL!"
 * "HEY! I CAN'T HOLD ON ANYMORE!"
 * "HELP ME UP ALREADY!"

Saving a survivor hanging off a ledge

 * "Oh shit, look at ya. Let me help you up."
 * "I got ya, I got ya."
 * "Damn, this shit's messed up, you gonna hurt yourself hangin' there."
 * "What do you say we get your ass up off this here ledge?"
 * "Easy, let me help ya up now, cause I ain't gonna go get your ass if you fall."

When taking Pills or Adrenaline

 * "Ooff, ahh."
 * "All right, that hit the spot."
 * "That hit the spot."
 * "Yeah, that'll hold me."
 * "All right, that'll keep me tight."
 * "Woo, that'll keep me tight."

Magnum

 * "This here'll mess some shit up."

Pipe Bomb

 * [Taking] "Pipe bombs!"
 * "Pipe bombs here!"
 * "Got a pipe bomb here."
 * "Pipe bomb!"
 * [Taking] "Pipe bomb for me."
 * [Throwing] "Fire in the hole!"
 * "GRENADE!"
 * "Grenade, comin' at ya!"

Molotov

 * [Seeing] "Molotovs!"
 * "Molotovs here!"
 * "Molotovs over here!"
 * [Taking] "Grabbin' me a Molotov."
 * [Throwing] "Fire in the hoooole!"
 * "Grenade!"

Bile Bomb

 * [Seeing] "Boomer bile here!"
 * "Bottle of, ugh…puke here!"
 * [Taking] "Grabbin' PUKE!" [sometimes followed by] "I cannot believe I just said that."
 * "Grabbin' a bile jar!"
 * [Throwing] "HEADS UP!"
 * "Incoming!"

Sub-Machine Gun

 * "Pat at tat tat!"
 * "Grabbing a machinegun."
 * "Guess I'll take this here machine gun."

Assault Rifle

 * "I got the assault rifle."
 * "Gonna take the assault rifle."

AK-47

 * "Shit. Shoulda taught this class."
 * "Ah hell. Gonna set some things right with this shit."

Grenade Launcher

 * "I tell ya, it's gonna be raining zombie pieces."
 * "Damn, this shit looks dangerous."
 * "All right now, this is gonna blow some shit up."
 * "All right now, let's blow some shit up."
 * "Man, it's gonna be raining zombie parts."

Shotgun/Chrome Shotgun/Combat Shotgun

 * "This shotgun'll work."
 * "Grabbin' a shotgun."

Tactical Shotgun

 * "Oh, hell yeah, I'm takin' an autoshotgun.
 * "Autoshottie is mine."
 * "This shotgun will put the hurt on them zombies."

Hunting Rifle/Sniper Rifle

 * "Gonna scope some Smoker ass with this."
 * "Pow! I'm gonna snipe some bitches."
 * "Hey boy. Pow! Some bitches gonna get sniped."

Explosive Ammo

 * [Seeing] "Explosive rounds here!"
 * [Taking] " All right now, let's blow some shit up."
 * "Yes."
 * [Deploying] "Deploying fragged rounds!"

Incendiary Ammo

 * [Seeing]"Got some incendiary ammo!"
 * [Taking] "Boo-yeah!"
 * "Lets burn some shit UP!"
 * [Deploying] "Everyone, grab some incenderary ammo!"
 * "Deploying Fire bullets!"

Laser Sights

 * "Got some laser sights here."

Cricket Bat

 * "I'm gonna paddle the shit outta something."

Machete

 * "Got a machete."
 * "Machete here."

Nightstick

 * "I am gonna smack some shit with this."
 * "Nightstick here."
 * "Grabbing a nightstick."

Katana

 * "Ninja sword here."
 * "Shit, I'd pay cash money for this."
 * "Grabbing a sword."

Crowbar

 * "Crowbar."
 * "Any crates around here?"
 * "Grabbing a crowbar."

Guitar

 * "Guitar here."
 * [During Concert Finale] "Grabbin' a guitar"

Chainsaw

 * [Seeing] "Chainsaw here."
 * "Got a chainsaw."
 * [Rampaging] "EAT THAT SHIT!"
 * "HOW YOU LIKE THAT?!"
 * "HOW IT FEEL, HUH?!"
 * "YEAH!"
 * "Chew on THAT!"
 * "All RIGHT!"
 * "Grrrrrrr!"
 * "Grrrrr! Yeah!"
 * "Whoo! Yeah baby!"

Reloading

 * "Reloadin'!"
 * [After taking heavy damage] "Re-goddamn-loading!"

Incoming horde

 * "Here they come!"
 * "Ah shit, this ain't gonna be good."
 * "Shit, get ready!"
 * "All right now, they comin'."
 * "It's on."
 * "Game on, baby!"
 * "INCOMING!"
 * "All right, let's put on our game faces, they're comin!"
 * "Y'all stay close. It's on!"

Hazmat Infected

 * "What's with those suits?"

Jimmy Gibbs Jr.

 * "Heyyy! Jimmy Gibbs!"
 * "Forgive us, Jimmy, but we need your car."
 * "Sorry about this, Mr. Gibbs!"
 * "Jimmy Gibbs!"

Clown Infected

 * "Clowns!? Gimme a break…!"
 * "CLOWNS!!!"
 * "That clown's attractin' zombies!"

Mud Men

 * "Shoot the mudmen!"

Riot Infected

 * "That zombie's got armor! I want armor!"
 * "That dang zombie is bulletproof!"
 * "Shoot that zombie in the back!"
 * "Well I'll be damned—that zombie's wearin' armor!"

Killing an Special Infected without any survivor taking damage from it

 * "Got it!"
 * "Hit it."
 * "I got it."
 * "Dead!"
 * "Pow! Got it!"
 * "It's down."
 * "Got it!"
 * "I got it."
 * "That one's mine."
 * Ellis: "That was me, right there!"
 * Coach: "What? Ah, hell no, boy, that was me."

The Smoker

 * Hearing:
 * "Sounds like one-a them Smoker bitches."
 * Seeing:
 * "Tounger!"
 * "Smoker!"
 * Grabbed:
 * "Nooooooo!"
 * "What's got me?!"
 * "Hey! Where am I gettin' dragged off to?!"
 * "I'm all wrapped up!"
 * Constricted:
 * [coughing]
 * "The bitch is choking me!"
 * [raspy] "Get this motherf— [coughs] off me!"
 * [raspy]"Damn, SHIT!

The Boomer

 * Hearing:
 * Seeing:
 * "Roly Poly!"
 * "Fat guy!"
 * "Fat thing!"
 * "Boomer!"
 * Barfed on:
 * "AUGHH! SHIT!"
 * "What? D'oh!"
 * "Aah! [spits] Oh!"
 * Augh, dammit!

Hunter

 * Hearing:
 * "Punk-ass Hunter around."
 * "Sounds like a Hunter."
 * Seeing:
 * "We got a Hunter!"
 * Pounced On:
 * "GET IT OFF!"

Charger

 * Hearing:
 * "I hear a Charger. [sometimes followed by:] Don't get charged 'n' shit."
 * Seeing:
 * "Charger!"
 * "(Big/One) Arm!"
 * Pummeled:
 * "CHARGER GOT ME!"
 * "Charger! SHOOT!"
 * "Shoot the Charger!"
 * "Shoot this damn Charger!"
 * "Goddamn, one of y'all gonna shoot this thing?!"
 * "This thing's beating my ass!"
 * "Don't stand there! Kill this thing!"
 * "Charger's—poundin' me into the ground!"
 * "This Charger's poundin' me!"

Spitter

 * Hearing:
 * "That fat spittin' bitch is around."
 * "I hear that fat woman."
 * Seeing:
 * "Crazy woman!"
 * "Neck!"
 * "Spittin' thing!"
 * "Spitter!"
 * Goo Incoming:
 * "Burning shit comin'!"
 * "GOO COMING!"
 * "Heads up! GOO!"
 * Gooed:
 * "Shit! That long-neck bitch hit me!"
 * "Damn Spitter got me!"
 * "Burnin' goo!"
 * "Get outta the goo!"
 * "Goddammit! Goo!"
 * "What's this burnin' stuff?"
 * "That female zombie just spat somethin' on me!"
 * "Wha-SPIT!"
 * "You have got to be kiddin' me…"

Jockey

 * Hearing:
 * [in contempt] "Sounds like a little Jockey."
 * One of those leapin'-on-your-back bitches is around."
 * "I hear one-a those Jockeys. If I see it, I'm-a shoot the shit out of it!"
 * [in Dead Center] "'s that one-s those li'l things?"
 * Seeing:
 * "CRAZY LEGS!"
 * "Skittish one!"
 * "Little creep!"
 * Ridden:
 * "Ellis—Ellis, is that you? What the hell?'"
 * "Jockey on me!"
 * "Oh, lord no, that thing on me!"
 * "Jockey on my back!"
 * "Agh! Get this thing off of me!"
 * "KILL THAT THING ON MY BACK!"

Tanks

 * Seeing:
 * "Holy shit! What is that?!"
 * "Is that some kinda... super-ass zombie?"
 * "I'm gonna beat that Tank's ass!"
 * "Ohhh shit! Tank!"
 * "SHOOT THAT BIG MUTHA!"
 * "Oh! That ain't fair!"
 * "Keep pourin' it on!"
 * "Shoot it! Shoot it!"
 * "Hit it! Hit it!"
 * "Don't stop now. Shoot it!"
 * "Gigantic thing!"
 * Attacked while incacipitated:
 * "Hey! In case y'all didn't see it, I got a Tank on me!"
 * "Can't you see this thing is beating the shit out of me?!"
 * "Get this damn thing off!"
 * "I got a Tank on me!"
 * "Oh shit! Get this damn thing off of me!"
 * "Get it off - ah! - get it off of me!"

Witches

 * Hearing:
 * "Ya'll hear, get ready to toss that bitch."
 * "Quiet everybody, I hear a bitch."
 * "Quiet, y'all, I hear a witch."
 * "No lights."
 * "Y'all need to kill your lights."
 * "What is that, crying…?!"
 * [first time] "Rochelle…that ain't you, is it, girl?" (2 versions)
 * "I'll give her somethin' to cry about!"
 * Seeing:
 * "Witch!"
 * "Bitch!"
 * "I see that bitch!"
 * Startling Witch:
 * "God damn it!"
 * "OH SHIT!"
 * "Shit no."
 * "Damn!"
 * Running from the Witch:
 * "Shoot the witch! Shoot the witch!"
 * "Oh shit! Witch! Witch! Witch!"
 * "The bitch is chasing me!"
 * "Get out the way, Witch!"
 * "Bitch on my ass!"
 * "Coming through, Witch on my ass!"
 * "Run! Run! Witch coming through!"

The Hotel
[ Intro - first half ]
 * "HEYYY! COME BACK! COME BACK! -ahh, he ain't comin' back."
 * "Hey! There's still people on the roof! Get BACK HERE!"
 * "Aw, heck, the rescue chopper's leavin'!"
 * [unused] Nick: "Hey, come back! I'm here! There's still someone down here!"
 * Coach: "There are three other people here, son."
 * Nick: "Oh, good. You can count. I bet they'll come back now."

[ Intro - second half ]
 * "Looked like it was headin' to the mall across town."
 * "Okay, nobody panic. I live around here-and that chopper looks like it's headin' to the mall. It ain't far, I can take you there."
 * "There's a mall got turned into an evac station not too far from here. I'll bet that chopper's headin' there."
 * "Everybody calm down. I live around here, and that chopper looks like it's headin' to the mall. It ain't far-I'll take you there."
 * "Dollars to donuts, that chopper's headin' to the mall across town."
 * "Looks like it's headin' to the mall. Maybe they're still evacuatin' people there."
 * "Don't worry, they're heading to the mall, we can catch them there."
 * "Then let's do it. Everybody grab a weapon, and let's go."
 * Ellis: "That chopper looks like it's headin over to the evac station at the mall."
 * Coach: "Gotta agree. Let's follow them to the mall."

[ Grabbing a weapon ]
 * "We better grab a weapon. Might need to defend ourselves."
 * "I'm not a violent man. But I ain't stupid neither. Let's grab some weapons."
 * "Arm up. I don't have a good feeling about this."
 * "Grab whatever you can find to hit something with."
 * "If everyone's good with it, we should stick together."
 * "I don't like the sounds comin' from downstairs."

[ First encountering the Infected ]
 * "Jumpin' Jehosaphat! What are these things?"
 * "Y'all know what the hell these things are?"
 * "It's them or us."

[ Unused ]
 * "Damn. Sweet Georgia Brown..."
 * "Sweet Georgia Brown..."
 * "Sweet Hosanna..."
 * "These things move like greased lightning!"
 * "Man, I ain't ever killed nothin' before."
 * "This don't feel right."

[ Looking at the CEDA map ]
 * "Look at that map. We need to get ourselves to New Orleans."
 * "Would you look at this map. Folks, I think N'awlins is the last city standing in the country."
 * "We need to get to New Orleans."
 * "Would you look at this. Folks, I think N'awlins is the last city standing."
 * "Man, look at this map. We're all that's left."

[ Unused ]
 * Coach: "Man, look at this map. We're all that's left."
 * Nick: "So that's why I'm feeling so goddamn lucky."
 * Coach: "You're tirin' me real fast, son."
 * Coach: "Girl, you in news - you make any sense of this?"
 * Rochelle: "Yeah, yeah I can make sense of this. We are screwed."

[ Looking at the photo of a Boomer in a cage on the CEDA poster ]
 * "Oh man, look at that thing in there."
 * "How they hell did they capture this thing already?"

[ Looking at the first elevators ]
 * "Elevator's out!"
 * "Let's get to the stairs."

[ Unused ]
 * Coach: "Oh, crumbs! Elevator's out."
 * Nick: "Crumbs? Really, Coach? That's how you swear?"

[ Fire spreading ]
 * "We can get around the fire out here."
 * "We can walk along the ledge!"
 * "Let's try the ledge!"

[ Unused ]
 * Coach: "Man, it don't feel right breakin' property like this."
 * Nick: "I LOVE doing that." / "I will never get tired of that."

[ Grabbing a gun ]
 * "This'll help."
 * "Think the zombies mind if I take one of their guns?"
 * "Mm-hmm."
 * "That's better."
 * "Now I ain't effin' around!"
 * "I have NEVER been so happy to see a gun."
 * "If they had guns, they knew this was gonna get bad."
 * "Look at this, they knew damn well this was gonna get bad."
 * "Now we're talking."
 * "This gun DOES make it easier."
 * "THAT levels the playin' field."
 * "That's more like it."

[ Seeing the elevator ]
 * "This elevator's still on!"
 * "Hey, this elevator's still on!"
 * "Thank Jesus, this one's still on. I ain't walkin' down thirty flights of stairs."
 * "I don't think you're supposed to use an elevator when the building's on fire."
 * "You think that rule still applies if there's zombies in the building?"

[ Getting in the elevator ]
 * "Hit the button before this turns into a bad idea."
 * "Everybody into the elevator!"
 * "Get in the elevator!"
 * "Somebody push the button!"

[ Inside the elevator ]
 * Ellis: "Holy shit! This is some kind of nightmare. Goddamn Zombie Apocalypse and shit. Shit, shit, shit. What in the hell are we going to do?"
 * Coach: "Settle down, son. We're going to be okay. What's your name?"
 * Ellis: "Ellis, my name is Ellis."
 * Rochelle: "Hey. Name's Rochelle, you?"
 * Nick: "Name's Nick. But don't worry about learning it, 'cause I ain't sticking around long." / "Nick. Not that it matters, 'cause I think we should split up when this thing opens."
 * Coach: "Let's stay together for a little while longer at least. Okay, Nick?"
 * Nick: "Nick, name's Nick. You all did good. What're your names?"
 * Coach: "People just call me Coach."
 * Rochelle: "My name's Rochelle. You?"
 * Ellis: "My name is Ellis, but some people call me El. I really prefer Ellis 'cause El kinda sounds like a girl's name. But if you prefer to call me El I guess you can."
 * Nick: "Name's Nick. Anyone get bit? Isn't that how this works?"
 * Coach: "No, I'm good. My friends call me Coach. I guess y'all can do the same."
 * Rochelle: "Hey. Name's Rochelle, you?"
 * Ellis: "Ellis. Pleasure to meet you, Rochelle."

[ If Ellis is dead ]
 * Coach: "People call me Coach, what's your name?"
 * Nick: "Name's Nick. Hey, what's your name?"
 * Rochelle: "Rochelle. Who'd we lose? I think it was Ellis."
 * Coach: "Little man, we are goin' to miss you."

[ If Nick is dead ]
 * Rochelle: "Hey. Name's Rochelle, you?"
 * Coach: "People just call me Coach."
 * Ellis: "Folks call me Ellis. I run an auto shop around here. Instead of evacuatin', I armored up a truck to drive myself out of here. Built that thing to be zombie proof. Turns out it was only ninety-nine percent zombie proof. The last one percent tore that truck to shit."
 * Coach: "Boy, you are wearin' me out."
 * Rochelle: "I think it was Nick."

[ If Rochelle is dead ]
 * Nick: "There's blood on me, but it ain't mine. Name's Nick. Hey, what's your name?"
 * Ellis: "Ellis, my name is Ellis."
 * Coach: "People just call me Coach. Who'd we lose?"
 * Nick: "I think she just said it was Rochelle."

[ Unused ]
 * "So. Pleased to meet you. You can call me Coach. What's your name?"
 * "My name's Coach. I don't like bein' here any more than you do-but if we gotta fight, we might as well fight together."
 * "My name's Coach. And I know how to shoot a gun."
 * "People call me Coach. And I live here."
 * "There we go. Most people call me Coach. And we're gonna be okay. Just gotta keep our heads."
 * "Everyone just calls me Coach."
 * "No, I'm good. You?"
 * "We are not off to a good start."
 * "I think it was Ellis."
 * "I think it was Nick."
 * "I think she said it was Rochelle. Poor girl."
 * "I thought your name was Ellis."
 * "We gotta work together. We can't lose anyone else. My name's Coach. What you folks call yourselves?"
 * "I don't think so."
 * "Coach'll work."

[ Elevator stopped ]
 * "Get ready..."
 * "All right, enough chat. Get ready."

The Streets
[ In saferoom ]
 * Coach: "There's a gun store on the way to the mall. What do you say we pay it a visit?"
 * Nick: "Sounds good to me." / "A gun store sounds like a fine place to stop."
 * Coach: "There's a gun store on the way to the mall. What do you say we pay it a visit?"
 * Rochelle: "Okay, this man's talking some sense. Let's get out of here."
 * Ellis: "Heh heh. Zombie apocalypse ain't all that bad."
 * Ellis: "Ooh, I know a gun store we can stop at along the way. Get ourselves some real weapons."
 * Nick: "I guess living here's finally paying off."
 * Coach: "Mister... I don't think I like your attitude."
 * Nick: "Whatever."
 * Ellis: "My buddy Keith tried camping out on top of a building once. He was shooting crows but the police were too busy tear gassing him to ask what he was doing up there. He screamed for an entire year every single time he opened his eyes. Oh, man. At first it was funny, then it just got sad, but then it got funny again. Oh, man."
 * Coach: "We ain't got time for this, Ellis."
 * Ellis: "Okay."

[ Exiting the saferoom ]
 * "Let's go find that mall/helicopter."

[ Unused ]
 * "There's another chopper! We're close to the mall now."

[ Looking at a sign ]
 * "Mall's that way! Let's move!"
 * "Mall's that way! Just keep followin' the signs!"
 * "We're headin' the right way to the mall."
 * "Stay with me! That mall's just up ahead!"
 * "Look alive! We're getting close to the mall!"

[ Seeing the bridge (unused) ]
 * "Mall's over this bridge!"
 * "Bridge to the mall's blocked! We gotta find another way."
 * "Let's try the door."

[ Crossing an empty street (unused) ]
 * "Damn. Where is everybody?"
 * Coach: "Shit. This place is deserted. It's startin' to creep me out."
 * Nick: "It's starting to creep you out?"

[ Getting close to the gun store ]
 * "That gun store's around here somewhere."
 * "We're getting close to that gun store."
 * "That gun store's just up ahead. Let's stock up and keep moving."
 * "Gun store's just down these stairs!"
 * "That gun store's around here somewhere."

[ Entering the gun store ]
 * "Paydirt!"
 * "I don't know how to shoot one, guess we're even."
 * "Haha, paydirt!"
 * "Pretty sure alla these'll kill them zombies."
 * "This here is a lot of guns."

[ Talking to Whitaker ] "Well man-I'll get you your drinks, but you better help us." "I hear ya, my man. I understand your need for snacks. But I just gotta be clear that if we get 'em, you are gonna help us." "Cola and nuts? Could go for some myself. Better not be diet cola. Because that I will not do." "I have never killed zombies on a snack run, but today is a day of firsts. If you don't mind us using your guns to do it, we're good to go." "Nick, don't give me that look. Cola and nuts might be this man's last meal. We can't deny him that. We get him his snacks, he helps us. I'm good with it."
 * Whitaker: "Hello there. I've barricaded myself on the roof with ample provisions. But in my haste I forgot cola. So here is my proposition. If you go find me some cola at yonder food store, I'll clear a path to the mall for you.
 * Coach: "Finally, somethin' that makes sense to me: a man and his snacks. We'll hook ya up. Just don't forget to take care of us."

[ Inside the food store ]
 * "Here comes the alarm."
 * "There's the cola!"
 * "Grab the cola!"
 * "I got the cola, let's get back!"
 * "All right, I got the crazy man's cola! Let's go!"
 * "I got the cola!"
 * "Grabbin' cola!"

[ Whitaker blows up the truck ]
 * "Barrier's down! Let's move, baby!"
 * "Path clear! Let's get to that mall!"
 * "When that man says he's gonna clear a path, he clears a path!"
 * "That's how I used clear a path when I played college ball."
 * "Path's clear! Let's move, baby!"
 * "Path's clear! Let's get to that mall!"
 * "Enjoy those cola and nuts, man! Thanks for the guns!"

[ Getting close to the mall ]
 * "Ha-ha! There's the mall!"
 * "Hmm. This mall look busy to you?"
 * "I guess all the people must be inside."

The Mall
[ Inside saferoom ]
 * "Keep an eye out for the evac center. Also the food court. I am starving."
 * Nick: "Let's go find this evacuation center. I'm already sick of this place."
 * Coach: "CEDA's gotta be around here somewhere. Let's find this evac and get out of here."
 * Coach: "Everybody, gather 'round. Let's pray. Dear Lord. See us safely through our time of trial in this mall. And please Lord... let the food court be okay."
 * Ellis: "Amen."
 * Rochelle: "Amen." / "Lord, have mercy on Coach and spare the food court."
 * Ellis: "Man I love malls. I do. Once I was in this mall, up in Atlanta, and these guys were dancing for like money and stuff and my friend Dave and I was all..."
 * Coach: "We ain't got time for this, Ellis."
 * Ellis: "Okay."

[ Going through the mall ]
 * "If I see a zombie running at me with a sample tray, I ain't shootin' it."
 * "Evac's this way!"
 * "I hope somebody got out all right..."
 * "I hope the food court's okay."
 * "Evac's up ahead!"
 * "...poor food court never stood a chance..."
 * "Hmm. About time a store gives a man a haircut while he buys himself some pants."
 * "I could roll up a whole pizza right now, eat it sub-style."

[ Setting off the alarm ]
 * "We gotta turn off that alarm!"
 * "Keep going!"
 * "Someone turn off the alarm!"
 * "Don't stop running!"
 * "Last one to turn off the alarm is a rotten egg!"

[ Turning alarm off ]
 * "Got it!"
 * "I can still hear it in my head, but I think the alarm is off."

[ At the deserted evacuation center ]
 * "What the hell is CEDA doing?"
 * "I won't lie. It don't look good."
 * "I hope somebody got out all right..."
 * (Unused) "Some of the refugees must've built a safe room!"

Atrium Finale
[ In saferoom ]
 * Nick: "Who the hell is Jimmy Gibbs, Jr.?"
 * Coach: "Ohh heyyy! Jimmy Gibbs!" / "I heard of Jimmy Gibbs! That man's a stock car legend."
 * Nick: "I'm getting sick of looking at this guy's face."
 * Coach: "Well, trust me - in these parts? He's as famous as... Elvis. Or the President."
 * Nick: "Really? 'Cause he looks like an asshole."
 * Coach: "Get your ass movin', Nick."
 * Rochelle: "Anybody know who the race car guy is?"
 * Ellis: "Just the best stock car racer of all time. Try reading a book sometime."
 * Rochelle: "Jimmy Gibbs Jr... Yay."
 * Ellis: "That man is the pride of Georgia. I would take a bullet for that man."/ "If the laws of nature allowed it, I would bear that man's children."
 * Coach: "Amen!"
 * Ellis: "Jimmy Gibbs, Jr. is the man. I mean I don't know anybody like that, man. But there was this guy I knew, he raced dirt tracks, not stock cars but open wheeled cars you know, and he was racing once and a goat..."
 * Coach: "We ain't got time for this, Ellis."
 * Ellis: "Okay. But there was a goat."

[ Leaving the saferoom ]
 * "If we see a Jimmy Gibbs zombie, somebody else is gonna have to kill him."
 * "Are we gonna put up tents and shit, or keep movin'?"

[ In the Atrium ]
 * Coach: "What do y'all make of this?"
 * Nick: "We're pretty screwed."
 * Coach: "No shit."

[ Inside the elevator ]
 * Coach: "Looks like we're gonna have to save ourselves. Anybody got an idea, speak up, we're listenin'."
 * Ellis: "I might have an idea. Let's go find Jimmy Gibbs's stock car. We get that thing gassed up, we will drive out of here!"
 * Coach: "Forgive us, Jimmy, but we need your car." / "Normally I wouldn't do this. But in these circumstances, I think Mr. Gibbs, Jr. ain't gonna mind." / "Normally I wouldn't agree to do this. But in these circumstances, I think Mr. Gibbs, Jr. ain't gonna mind."
 * Ellis: "Wherever he is, Coach - he's proud of you. All right, I'm bettin' the gas tank'll probably be empty. We'll have to gas it up before we haul ass."
 * Coach: "Soon as these doors open, get ready to move."
 * Coach: "Looks like we're gonna have to save ourselves. Anybody got an idea, speak up, we're listenin'." / "All right, so... Getting' evac'd ain't happening. Anybody got an idea, now's the time."
 * Ellis: "I might have an idea. Let's go find Jimmy Gibbs's stock car. We get that thing gassed up, we can drive out of here."
 * Coach: "Son, you got a DEAL.." / "Ha HA! All the way to New Orleans! Baby, that sounds like a plan."
 * Ellis: All right, I'm bettin' the gas tank'll probably be empty. We'll have to gas it up before we haul ass." / "Now remember: They don't fill up the tanks at car shows, so we'll have to find some gas."
 * Coach: "Soon as them doors open? You run your ass off and find some gas." / "Soon as these doors open, get ready to move."

[ Starting finale ]
 * "Haul ass and get gas!"
 * "Let's go! Find a gas can!"
 * "Let's get this car gassed up!"

[ Car ready ]
 * "We're all gassed up, get to the car!"
 * "Here we come, New Orleans!"
 * "Get to the car!"
 * "Get to the car, people!"

[ Ending cutscene ]
 * "Hit it!"
 * "Sorry about this, Mr. Gibbs."
 * "Go, Ellis, go!"
 * "Woo! Thank you, Mr. Gibbs."
 * "Punch it, Ellis!!"

The Riverbank
[ Intro ]
 * Coach: "Hey, hello there! You wanna let the bridge down for us?"
 * Zoey: "Generator's out on the other side!"
 * Coach: "Y'all can't climb down there and save us a trip?"
 * Zoey: "Sorry, can't! We got wounded up here. If you can get to the other side of the bridge, we can help you can get it down."
 * Coach: "Got it. We'll holla back at you when we get there."
 * Ellis: "Well hello! Hello... Howdy. Beautiful weather, huh... we're havin'... Oh god, I'm too nervous to talk to her, one of you better do this."
 * Coach: "You been killin' zombies for the better part of two days, boy you can talk to a girl."
 * Zoey: "You are going to need to get to the other side of the bridge. We can help you there."
 * Coach: "Okay, the boy says thank you."
 * Ellis: "Coach, come on, man!"
 * Francis: "Are any of you vampires?"
 * Coach: "No. Can you lower the bridge?"
 * Francis: "Sorry, can't."
 * Coach: "Shit, okay. Yes, we are vampires? All of us are vampires?"
 * Francis: "Louis! I told you there were vampires! [Cut: Louis: "No there aren't, Francis, tell them they have to get to the other side of the bridge."] I'm not talking to any goddamn vampires."
 * Coach: "Tell me this boy ain't for real." / "Dear Lord, why'd I ever leave Savannah."

[ Looking at the historic sign ]
 * "Historic Under-the-River Tour! This could be pretty interesting!"
 * "Let's all try this under-the-river tour to get across."
 * "Sign says there's an under-the-river tour, that'll get us across."
 * "If we can't take the bridge, let's take the tunnel."
 * Rochelle: "Coach, you know anything about this under the river tour?"
 * Coach: "Uh, yeah. It's historic." / "I don't know, goes under the river."
 * Rochelle: "Thanks Coach." / "Gee, thanks Coach." / "Uh, gee, glad I asked." / "Glad I asked." / "Good enough." / "Well, okay... Good enough."

[ Going in the gun store ]
 * "Guns in the store."
 * [ If Francis was on the bridge ] Nick: "Hold on a sec, I'm gonna go back and shoot that jackass." / "Hold on, I'm gonna go back and shoot that tattoo disaster." / "I would love to go back and shoot that vest-wearing jackass."
 * Coach: "Nick, you gotta pull yourself together."

[ At the wedding reception ]
 * "Damn. This here wedding didn't end well."
 * Coach: "Bride. Wedding. Gotta be cake around here somewhere."
 * Nick: "Coach, no time for cake." / "I'll keep an eye out for some." / "Coach, I'll keep an eye out for some. Okay, buddy?"
 * Coach: "Look, uh, anyone see the wedding cake?" / "Shhh... Does anyone see the wedding cake?" / "Anyone see the wedding cake?"
 * Ellis: "Ain't seen none, Coach, but I'll yell if I do."

[ Seeing the Witch ]
 * Nick: "Careful! I've seen a bride just like this before."
 * Coach: "Man, I hope we don't see a Tank in a tuxedo."
 * [ If Zoey was on the bridge ] Nick: "Ellis, maybe you should grab that dress for your new girlfriend, huh?" / "Ellis, go give the bride a kiss, it'll be good luck. Trust me." / "Hey, Ellis look, it's another angel."
 * Ellis: [whispering] "Shut up, Nick." / "What?!"
 * Coach: "Come on, Nick, not the time."

[ Chased by the Witch ]
 * "Bride's chasing me!"
 * "Ugly bride's chasing me! Bride's chasing me!"
 * "Kill the bride! Kill the bride!"

[ Witch dies ]
 * Coach: "Mm, now that's a shotgun wedding."
 * Nick: "That's a good one, Coach." / "Coach! That's a good one." / "Spectacular, Coach." / "Very true." / "Well put." / "Wow, true."
 * Ellis: "Kinda feel bad killin' this witch."
 * Coach: "You got problems, boy. Deep down problems."
 * Ellis: "Whole thing makes me uncomfortable."
 * Coach: "Yeah, that shit was creeping me out."
 * Ellis: "Hey, Coach. Can coaches marry people?"
 * Coach: "No, Ellis."

[ When Zoey was on the bridge ]
 * Ellis: "You know what? This got me thinking... I should totally marry that girl." / "This reminds me, I should totally marry that girl." / "This wedding here? I'm takin' this as a sign."
 * Coach: "Got to keep your head on killin' zombies, Ellis."

[ Going in a tent ]
 * "Check those tents."
 * "Guns in these here tents. Damn, but no cake."

The Underground
[ In saferoom ]
 * Ellis: "Oh, I keep hoping we drive to a place where there aren't any more zombies."
 * Rochelle: "Oh, I just keep hoping I wake up every day."
 * Coach: "Man, I keep hoping we find an open Burger Tank."
 * Nick: "Whatever."
 * Coach: "All this runnin' we been doing? I bet I lost, what, five pounds."
 * Rochelle: "Well, anybody who survives this shit is gonna be in great shape."
 * Coach: "Man, I just realized with all this runnin', climbin' and fightin', I ain't even had time to eat."
 * Rochelle: "You're looking good, Coach."
 * Rochelle: "We need to get motivated. How we gonna get motivated... Coach. We make it to New Orleans, there's a Cheeseburger museum."
 * Coach: "Oh. In my heart, I'm there already."
 * Rochelle: "Hey, Ellis? I hear there's a Stock Car museum in New Orleans."
 * Ellis: "Get outta here! All right!"
 * Rochelle: "Nick, there's a-"
 * Nick: "Yeah, no, I'm good, I'm good."
 * Coach: "City of Rayford! They used to have a boiled peanut festival here. Good memories."
 * Rochelle: "I have a bunch of good memories, too... of never once going to a boiled peanut festival." / Nick: "Boiled nuts? Christ. What is wrong with you Southerners?" / "Boiled nuts? Coach, come on, what is wrong with you Southerners?"
 * Coach: "Nick, tell me you ain't looking forward to this under-the-river tour."
 * Nick: "I am not looking forward to this under the river tour."
 * Coach: "Man, Nick, you got a find a way to cheer your ass up. We ain't got much to look forward to."
 * Nick: "Coach, it's a hole. Oh no, excuse me, an historic hole. Under a river."
 * [If Francis was on the bridge] Coach: "Nick, tell me you ain't looking forward to this under-the-river tour."
 * Nick: "I am not looking forward to this under the river tour."
 * Coach: "Man, Nick, you got a find a way to cheer your ass up. We ain't got much to look forward to."
 * Nick: "Okay, good point. You know what? I am looking forward to punching that grease bag biker in the mouth."
 * Coach: "There you go, Nick. Stay positive." / "There you go, Nick. Stay positive. Maybe you'll knock all his teeth out."
 * Nick: "So this under-the-river tour, who wants to bet that is going to be filthy."
 * Coach: "Oh, come on, you aren't afraid of a little dirt are you?"
 * Nick: "A germ just wiped out the whole planet, Coach. So yes."
 * Nick: "So we find this historic section. Go under the river. And then we kick that biker dude's ass, right?"
 * Coach: "Nick. Son. I think we got bigger problems."
 * Coach: "I heard all about this under-the-river tour, supposed to be pretty damn good. Real educational."
 * Nick: "Okay, let me get this straight. It's a tunnel... under the river. Right?"
 * Coach: "You damn right. Under a river."
 * Nick: "And this is supposed to teach me about what exactly?"
 * Coach: "Uh, historical shit. Man, how am I supposed to know? I ain't been there yet."
 * Ellis: "You know, we've been gone for a while, you think the car is okay?"
 * Coach: "Ellis, you do know that eventually we're gonna have to leave that car behind. Right?"
 * Ellis: "Yeah, yeah, that's not going to happen."
 * Coach: "Boy, the Military ain't exactly going to strap it to the bottom of a helicopter."
 * Ellis: "Okay, Coach. Whatever you say."
 * Coach: "I bet I'm losin' some serious weight! Two more days, I'll be takin' my belt in a notch."
 * Ellis: "Oh dude, this reminds me of that time, my buddy Keith? He went on a diet, on account of what his doctor sayin' he had to go on a diet, or he'd die? So they told him he could drink nothin' but them little diet shakes, but those are like five bucks a can, I'll make my own damn smoothies!' He got himself a blender, all sorts of salad shit, kiwis, limes, some tequila, a big can of that protein powder the bodybuilders use..."
 * Rochelle: "Did any of this actually work?"
 * Ellis: "Naw, he gained like thirty pounds. But he invented a shitload of tasty drinks. I was always partial to Keith's Kiwi Kamikaze."
 * [ If Zoey was on the bridge ] Ellis: "Ah man, that Zoey will never go for a man like me."
 * Rochelle: "Ellis, ask yourself, what would Keith do?"
 * Ellis: "Oh, Ro, man, that reminds me of this..."
 * Coach: "Girl! What are you doing?"
 * Rochelle: "Ah! I wasn't thinking."
 * Coach: "Listen, if you let your guard down for one minute... we all pay the price."

[ Looking at the tattoos ]
 * "I got that one, that one... Hell, I got most of these."
 * "Shit, it's all south of the border."
 * "Coach's got a lot of real estate."
 * "Hey, Coach keeps his secrets."

[ Starting the jukebox ]
 * "This jukebox is all right."
 * "Oh shit, this thing is still on!"

[ Seeing the Midnight Riders bus ]
 * "Man, I think I just saw... nah."
 * "I must be dreaming."

[ Seeing the suitcase full of pistols and money ]
 * [singing] "'...a suitcase full of pistols and mon-nay!'"

[ Walking over the plank ]
 * "Over this plank."
 * "Hurry up and get your asses over this plank."
 * "Oh shit, do not look down."
 * "Easy now, don't be playin' on this board."

[ Approaching the Jazz Club ]
 * "Into the Jazz Club."
 * "Tour's in the Jazz Club."

[ Going in the underground ]
 * "Here we go, under the river."

[ Walking on the walkway ]
 * "Keep to the walkway."
 * "Follow the walkway."
 * "Shit, they must have locked up all the history to keep it safe."
 * Coach: "Man, this is a real..."
 * Nick: "Shithole?"
 * Coach: "Yeah. It's a shithole."
 * Nick: "Toldja."
 * Coach: "Man, this is a real..."
 * Rochelle: "Shithole? Sorry Coach."
 * Coach: "Man, look at all this, uh... uh... Aw, man, this tour is bullshit."
 * Nick: "Yeah. Tunnels. You're right, Coach, you're so right. History is coming alive."
 * Coach: "Aw, shut up, Nick." / Ellis: "Nick! We all see this tour's got some problems, no sense picking on Coach."

[ Seeing "Phase 2" ]
 * "Tour's over? Shit."
 * "Tour's over? Bullshit."
 * "Phase two coming in 2010? Shit, phase one ain't done."
 * "Phase two my ass."

[ Jumping in the water ]
 * "Together, people."
 * "Don't get left behind."

[ In the water ]
 * "Don't stop, people!"
 * "Come on now, let's just get through this shit."
 * "All right, let's keep moving. Unless Nick wants to stop and take a bath."
 * "Hey Nick, try and keep your head above water."
 * "Don't trip, Nick." [laughs]
 * Nick: "Here's a pleasant thought: Any one of us gets pounced, we are going to be fully submerged in shit water."
 * Coach: "Gotta keep your head above water, man." [laughs]
 * Nick: "It's just a storm sewer, it is just a storm sewer..."
 * Coach: "Nick, my man, face it. We are walkin' through shit."
 * Nick: "Seriously, look, I will pay any one of you a thousand dollars right now to give me a piggyback ride."
 * Coach: "Nick, if I give you a piggy back ride, will you shut up about the sewer?"
 * Nick: "YES."
 * Ellis: "Oh man, I found a candy bar! ...Whup. False alarm."
 * Coach: "Oh, Jesus! Ellis!" / "Oh, come on! Jesus! Ellis!"
 * Ellis: "Okay if anybody needs a bathroom break, now'd be a good time."
 * Coach: "Hey, hold on there, boy, let me get out of the water!"

[ Opening the bridge (originally, the survivors had to push a button to raise a bridge (like in the second chapter of Death Toll) which eventually collapsed, and had later to use another bridge) ]
 * "Let's raise this bridge."
 * "That button will raise the lift."
 * "Shit, we gotta hit that button."
 * "This looks like the only way."
 * "Ahh come on, elevator!"
 * "That is some slow ass shit."
 * "Lift is coming!"
 * "All right, the lift is coming, come on... come on..."
 * "Lift coming!"
 * "This one better work."
 * "Second time better be the charm."
 * "Oh damn, another one of these things?"
 * "Ellis, don't break it this time."
 * "Bridge here, let's go!"
 * "Come on, let's get out of this sewer!"
 * "Come on, people, don't stand around, let's go!"

[ Looking for a ladder ]
 * "There's gotta be a ladder here somewhere."
 * "Let's find ourselves a ladder."
 * "Holler if you see a ladder."
 * "We need to get on the catwalks."
 * "We need to get out of this shit."
 * "Keep running, that alarm ain't goin' off."
 * "That alarm is gonna keep goin'!"

[ Seeing a ladder ]
 * "A ladder!"
 * "Ladder!"
 * "Thank you, Jesus, a ladder!"
 * "Up that ladder!"
 * "Let's get out of the water."
 * "Everybody up there!"
 * "All right, out of the water."

[ Going back in the water ]
 * "Damn, back in the water, people."
 * "Let's just get this over with."
 * "Can't stay up here all day y'all."
 * "One more time!"
 * "Ah hell, more water."
 * "Ah hell, back in the water!"

The Port
[ In saferoom ]
 * [If Francis was on the bridge] Coach: "I don't trust that biker. He's probably long gone by now."
 * Ellis: "Nah man, he seemed like a good guy."
 * Coach: "Minute we left, bet ya he stole the Jimmy Gibbs Jr."
 * Ellis: "He is a dead man. He is a dead man. Folks, we got a new goal. New Orleans is gonna have to wait. We are going to have to hunt that biker man down." / "I will kill him. I will kill him. Folks, we got a new goal. New Orleans is gonna have to wait. We are going to have to hunt that biker man down."
 * Rochelle: "Great. Thanks, Coach." / "Thanks, Coach."
 * Nick: "I don't trust that biker. He better still be here."
 * Rochelle: "He'll be there."
 * Nick: "You know him that well?"
 * Rochelle: "I just have a good feeling." / "It's a woman thing; I just have a good feeling."
 * Nick: "You got a good feeling about every scumbag that lives on a bridge?
 * Coach: "Sometimes you just gotta have faith, Nick."
 * [If Zoey was on the bridge] Coach: "Ellis. It's showtime, buddy."
 * Ellis: "How do I look?" / "How do I look, man?"
 * Nick: "Like you've been crawling through a sewer."
 * Ellis: "You got a turd on your shoulder, Nick."
 * Nick: "I'm not even going to look." / "I'm not even going to look, Ellis."
 * Coach: "Hey, Ellis, you ready to meet that Zoey girl again?" [laughs]
 * Ellis: "Man, I don't know, what do you think? With the hat or without it?"
 * Rochelle: "Just be your own sweet self, Ellis." / "You're great. Just be your own sweet self, Ellis."
 * Nick: "Don't listen to her. You got five minutes to get this done, Ellis. It is do or die time, buddy."
 * Rochelle: "I just think Nick is jealous." / "Nick is just jealous."

[ Meeting the survivors again ]
 * Coach: "Hey! So how do we lower this bridge?"
 * Francis: "I've been thinking about this. We lost a good man getting this goddamn thing up. I'm not real happy about putting it back down again."
 * Coach: "So what, you gonna live up here?"
 * Francis: "Look, brother. We lost a good man. Another one is hurt. We can't get that generator filled up until Louis is back on his feet."
 * Louis: "Francis! We talked about this. We're gonna help them. We will lower the bridge, but you gotta fill up the generator for us to lower it. That helps us both."
 * Coach: "Sounds fair."
 * Louis: "Hey, you made it!"
 * Coach: "Damn right. We're getting good at killing these things."
 * Louis: "Where you guys headin?"
 * Coach: "New Orleans, want to come with us?"
 * Louis: "Nah, better not. We've had enough with the military."
 * Coach: "So how we gonna get this bridge down?"
 * Louis: "Take that elevator down, fill up the generator, we'll take care of the rest."
 * Louis: "You made it! Now you just need to fill that generator and we can raise the bridge! We can even help cover you from up here."
 * Coach: "Hey listen, thanks for the help. And when the bridge is down, you're more than welcome to come with us."
 * Louis: "I don't think that would work."
 * Coach: "Hell, we can even leave Ellis behind to make room for y'all."
 * Ellis: "Hey!" / "Hey, what?!"
 * Louis: "Thanks! Sounds good but I think we're gonna stay on our own."
 * Coach: "All right, understood. Y'all keep safe now."

[ Going down the elevator ]
 * "No messin' around, let's get these cans."
 * "We do this and get back to the car."
 * "Let's fill that generator and then get back to the car."
 * "All right, look, no messin' around, let's get these cans."
 * Ellis: "Man, I'm gonna kill so many zombies she's gonna have to love me." / "I'm gonna kill a Tank in her honor. Ooh, and then I'm gonna name it after her."
 * Coach: "Ellis. Keep your mind on the cans not the girl."

[ When a survivor drops supplies ]
 * "Thanks for sharing!"
 * "Thanks my man."
 * "Man, you guys are all right."
 * "Hey, thanks for the supplies."
 * "We owe you one."
 * "Maybe two!"

[ After Louis makes a kill ]
 * "All right Louis, keep tearing 'em up!"
 * "Louis in the house!"

[ After Francis makes a kill ]
 * "Thanks, Francis!"
 * "Nice shot, Francis!"

[ After Zoey makes a kill ]
 * "Go Zoey!"
 * "Keep it up, Zoey!"

[ After a survivor drops the last gas can ]
 * "You three keep safe."
 * "We owe you."
 * "You good? See y'all!"
 * "Well all right. We're gonna remember y'all."

[ Running across the bridge ]
 * "Get to the car!"
 * "Let's get to the car!"
 * "Bridge is down, let's go!"
 * "Come on people, GET TO THE CAR! GET TO THE CAR!"
 * "We gotta run, GO!"

[ Coach hears about one of the survivors's death (cut) ]
 * Francis: "There's not many of us left, brother." / Louis: "I hope you don't mind if we stay on our own."
 * Coach: "Sorry to hear it." / "Damn, I think we're all losin' people." / "Shit. Not a lot of good news goin' round these days."

The Highway
Coach: "Hell, it got us this far. We'll find another way to N'awlins." Ellis: "Sorry, guys. Guess it wasn't such a hot idea after all." Coach: "Hell, it got us this far. We'll find another way to N'awlins." "But the roads blocked now." "All right, let's get back on foot." "Let's get back on foot." "Ain't no way to drive around this mess, let's walk it."
 * Intro
 * Ellis: "Sorry, folks. This car's capable of miracles, but it can't drive over twenty miles of parked cars. I think we're walkin'."
 * Nick: "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, guys - but unless Ellis knows how to build a monster truck, we ain't drivin' through this."
 * (Cut responses:) "Ellis, that was some good driving."

Nick: "Oh good. Now we can die there as adults."
 * Seeing the Whispering Oaks advertisement:
 * Coach: "Hey, Whisperin' Oaks! Shit, I used to go there when I was a kid!"

Coach: "Maybe they left 'em when they got rescued!" Nick:' "That's...one theory."
 * Going through the cars:
 * Nick: "These abandoned cars go on for MILES'."

"Head down this way."
 * Walking down the offramp:
 * "Down this offramp!"
 * "All right, take the off ramp."
 * (Cut:) "Down here."

Nick: "We'll head towards the searchlights. If there's an evac, it'll be there." / "Or maybe a corpse fell on the searchlight button. Still, worth checking out." (or:) Nick: "Searchlights over there. Could be a way out." Coach: "That there's Whispering Oaks." / "That there's Whispering Oaks Amusement Park." Nick: "Great, following shiny lights in the sky. We're like freaking cats and a laser pointer." Coach: "One place is as good as the next when you're dying." / "One place is as good as the next when you're dead." / "I don't think zombies turned those lights on."
 * Seeing the searchlights:
 * Coach: "Look, searchlights! Might be survivors there! We should check it out!" / "Look, searchlights! I bet that's Whisperin' Oaks."
 * Rochelle: "You guys see those searchlights? I say we head there."
 * (Cut responses:)
 * "Look at those lights to the left! They're having a party!"
 * "Well, might as well head to those light and join the party."
 * "Ah hell, those lights are an amusement park!"
 * "Jesus Christ, that's a Ferris wheel lit up."
 * "Let's head to the amusement park. Ain't like we have anywhere else to go."
 * "I don't think zombies turned those lights on."
 * Coach: "Well now, if we're picking directions, I say head towards the spinning lights."


 * Arriving at the motel:
 * "Highway's blocked! Let's check out the motel!"
 * "Whispering Oaks Motel? Sheeet... I know where we are!"
 * (Cut) "We gotta figure a way around this motel."


 * Searching the rooms:
 * "Check the rooms. Might be somethin' useful."


 * Seeing the gully:
 * "Watch that first step, baby."
 * "Whoa... Take it slow down this hill. Looks like a pretty big drop."
 * "Watch yourself on this hill..."
 * (Cut) "Bridge is out." / "We gotta cross the valley."
 * [EXTREMELY EXTREMELY EXTREMELY RARE!!!] [Witch is on the gulley] "Don't hit that bitch..."

Coach: "Damn, I am too old for this shit." / "Ain't used to this." Coach: "Nah, hell no." / "Ellis, you're a crazy man." / "You a crazy man, Ellis."
 * At the bottom:
 * [Trying really hard not to laugh] "It's not funny. You coulda really hurt your—Naw, it is funny!"
 * Ellis: "Coach, you're breathin' a little hard, you okay?"
 * Ellis: "Anybody wanna go back up and do that again?"


 * [Cut] Seeing dead bodies in the river:
 * "We ain't the only ones that thought to take this short-cut"
 * "Looks like people were heading towards Whispering Oaks."

"Well nobody but the zombies."
 * Arriving at the entrance of the park:
 * "There she is! Whisperin' Oaks! Man, I had some times there."
 * (Cut:) "Hm. Lights on, but nobody's home."

The Fairgrounds
Nick: "Never heard of 'em. They any good?" Coach: "Hell yes! I got all their albums. Even their new stuff that ain't no good. Best light show in the business, though." (Cut:) "Hell yes! I got all their albums. Even their new stuff that ain't no good. Best backup singers you ever want to hear." Ellis: "I'll back you up on that. Hell of a show." Ellis: "Stay on That Mountain! First single off their Ten Past Midnight album. I love that song." Rochelle: ""Stay on that mountain?" That doesn't sound like very good advice." Ellis: "Every Lady's Crazy! Never been recorded, only played live. You know the Riders, Coach." Rochelle: "Every lady present's getting a headache." Rochelle: "The Midnight Riders". So...they ride midnight? Or they ride at midnight? I hate classic rock." / "I hate classic rock." / "Who?" / "Midnight Riders? Is this one of those old guy bands?" / "The Midnight Riders… Yeah, I think my dad use to like that band…back in the 18th Century."
 * In the saferoom:
 * Coach: "Hey, the Midnight Riders! I used to love that band. Best pyrotechnics in the business." / "Hey! The Midnight Riders!"
 * Coach: "Hey, the Midnight Riders! I used to love that band. Best pyrotechnics in the business."
 * (Cut:) Coach: [singing] "...Gotta reach for the top, stay on that mountain... dunh-nuh-NAH-nuh-NAH-nha!"
 * (Cut:) Coach: [singing] "...Every lady's crazy when her daddy's not around... dunh-nuh-NAH-nuh-NAH-nha!"
 * (Cut) Coach: "Hey! The Midnight Riders!"
 * Coach: "You kiddin' me? They were... were—nah, not really. They had one good song."

"There's still searchlights on. I'd say that's a good sign." "Look, let's just find the corn dog stand and hold out there."
 * Exiting the saferoom:
 * "Man, I loved this place as a kid."
 * (Cut:) "We'll head towards the searchlights. If there's an evac, it'll be there."

Coach: "Oh. Ahh sorry, Ro." / "Uh, sorry, Ro."
 * [Cut] Entering the lady's restroom:
 * Rochelle: "Umm, guys, this is the lady's room."

Ellis: "Well, Coach? I aim to let you." (Cut) Rochelle: "Coach, you're making me hungry just listening to you."
 * Walking between the food tents:
 * "Elephant ears... funnel cakes... corn dogs... Man, these signs are bringin' back some memories."
 * "All these signs are making me hungry."
 * (Cut) "Oh, baby, I could destroy some kettle corn right now."
 * Coach: "I find a Burger Tank in this place? I'm-a be a one-man cheeseburger apocalypse."
 * Coach: [seeing the Cotton Candy stand] "Cotton Candy. The king of foods." / "Ah yeah. Cotton Candy. The wise pharaoh of food. Sittin' atop the food pyramid, passin' judgment on all lesser foods…"

Coach: "Sometimes it feels like we're babysitting, doesn't it?" Rochelle: "He is making the best of a bad situation." Nick: "He's like a five year old. With guns. And a comprehensive grasp of every swear word in the English language."
 * Entering Kiddie Land:
 * Ellis: "Holy shit, guys! KIDDIE LAND!"

"That peanut's got crazy eyes. They follow ya." "I don't like that peanut." "I do not like that little peanut." "I have never liked that peanut."
 * Seeing Li'l Peanut in Kiddie Land:
 * "I was a li'l peanut riding these. This here was my favorite."
 * (Cut:) "That peanut man's got wild, crazy eyes."

(Cut) Rochelle: "You can keep the cobbler. All I want is more guns."
 * Seeing a Peach Cobbler sign':'
 * Coach: "Mmmhmm. Peach cobbler."

"Damn it. They can't keep a candy machine filled up around here?"
 * Walking around Kiddie Land:
 * (Cut) "Once the world goes back to normal? I'm buyin' you guys a steak dinner."


 * [Cut] On top of the slide:
 * "Hey, hey, man... can't go down the slide without your sack."

Nick: "Nope. Just lots and lots of Tanks." Rochelle: "Soooooo many Tanks…" Ellis: "Ha, ha, ha." / "You keep it up with the height jokes, and I won't."
 * Looking at a "You must be this tall" panel:
 * Coach: ""You must be this tall to ride." Well, least there won't be no Jockeys in there."
 * (Cut) Coach: ""You must be this tall to ride." Sorry, Ellis. It's been real, man."

Nick: "You know what? Somehow, I think it's gonna activate everything else around here."
 * Approching the carousel:
 * Coach: "All right, this is gonna open the gate…and what the hell else?"


 * Turning the carousel on:
 * "Ahh damn, the merry-go-round started!"
 * "Shit. That thing's makin' a racket!"
 * "Turn it off, turn the damn thing off!"

Nick: "Tunnel of love? Jesus Christ." "Come on, get into the Tunnel of Love."
 * Entering the Tunnel of Love:
 * Coach: "There's the saferoom! Everybody in the Tunnel of Love!" / "Get your ass in the Tunnel of Love!" / "Get in the Tunnel of Love!"
 * (Cut:) "Oh yeah... Tunnel of Love."

The Coaster
Nick: "I think we should clarify what constitutes "close"." Coach: "Coach didn't do too bad for himself back in the day, Nick." / "Nick, I was on the football team. Coach did just fine." (Cut) Rochelle: "Damn, Coach. Sounds like you used to be on a diet of cheerleaders." / (Cut) Nick: "Sorry, Coach, you know what I mean." Coach: "How many Tunnel of Love memories you got, Nick?" Nick: "Psh! Huh. Several. Easily." Coach: "This is some crazy-ass world we live in now."
 * In saferoom:
 * Coach: "Well, looks like we're going through the Tunnel of Love, people. Stay close to me."
 * Nick: "Bringing back any memories, Coach? You, a cheeseburger, romance in the air...?"
 * Nick: "Bringing back any memories, Coach? You, a cheeseburger, romance in the air..."
 * Ellis: "I never once thought a merry-go-round would turn on me. I mean, what is the world comin' to when you dread a merry-go-round?"
 * "Well, looks like we're going through the Tunnel of Love, people. No hanky panky."


 * Exiting the saferoom: "Hey… No smoochin', y'all."

Nick: "Yeah. Don't drink it."
 * Going through the Tunnel of Love:
 * Coach: "This water don't look natural..."
 * Coach: "Back in the day, I had some posters that woulda looked good in this light."


 * In one of the maintenance rooms:
 * "Down (this/that) hole!"
 * "All right, let's do this together."
 * "Someone wanna count it off?"


 * Reentering the Tunnel of Love from the maintenance area:
 * "I don't remember the Tunnel of Love bein' this long. I musta had something else on my mind."
 * "Hm. Shit. First time I ever couldn't wait to get out of the Tunnel of Love."


 * Seeing the helicopter:
 * "There's that chopper (again)!"
 * "There goes the chopper!"

Coach: "Naw, this ain't gonna be cool. You ain't right in the head, boy."
 * At the Screaming Oak:
 * Ellis: "We gotta run the coaster? Aw, man, this is gonna be cool!"
 * "The only way over is over the coaster."
 * "Get ready to run, I'm hittin it."
 * "This is some crazy-ass world we live in now."
 * (Cut responses:) "Running the Screamin' Oak... Now don't that beat all..."
 * "We're blocked by the (coaster/Screamin' Oak)."


 * Running the Screaming Oak:
 * "We gotta turn that alarm off!"
 * "Somebody turn off that alarm!"
 * "Just keep following the tracks, and we'll get through this!"
 * "Stay on the tracks!"
 * "Turn that shit off."
 * (Cut) "That set off the alarm!"
 * "That set off the warning system!"
 * "Kill that alarm."


 * Cut quote regarding a possible scrapped saferoom:
 * "Into the trailer."

The Barns

 * Near the bumper cars:
 * "Through the bumper cars!"


 * Seeing the helicopter again:
 * "There's that chopper again!"
 * "There goes the chopper!"


 * Seeing the stadium:
 * "Let's get inside the stadium, I have an idea!"
 * (Cut) "Let's get into the stadium."
 * "How the hell we gonna get in there?"
 * "There's the Peach Bowl!"
 * "I hear somethin' go on in there!"
 * "Midnight Riders to the rescue!"
 * "We need to signal the chopper!"
 * "I know how we can signal that chopper."
 * "Ellis, you ready to rock?"


 * Cut sequence involving a monorail:
 * "If we can get on the monorail, we can jump the fence."
 * "We need to get on the monorail."
 * "Onto the monorail."
 * "Everybody go, go, go. Onto the monorail."
 * "Jump over that fence."


 * Entering the barns:
 * "Through the farm hall."
 * "Through the farm exhibits."


 * At the stadium gate:
 * "We can get into the stadium through here!"
 * "Into the stadium!"

The Concert
Ellis: "Coach, I hate to break it to ya, but I don't think they're actually here." Coach: "We set off their finale, that chopper pilot's gonna know something's up. Because nobody, and I mean nobody, has a bigger pyrotechnic show than the Midnight Riders." Nick: "Coach, that is about the stupidest idea I've ever agreed with." Coach: "Alright then, everybody grab a weapon and let's move!" / "Then let's do it. Everybody grab a weapon and let's go!" Ellis: "Coach, I hate to break it to ya, but I don't think they're actually here." Coach: "We set off their finale, that chopper pilot's gonna know something's up. Because nobody, and I mean nobody, has a bigger light show than the Midnight Riders." Nick: "Okay, we'll set off the pyrotechnics, but I'm telling you right now. I AM NOT GOING TO AIR GUITAR." Ellis: "And that'll signal the chopper pilot! This is gonna be like the fourth time the Midnight Riders have saved my life." / Rochelle: "Huh. That's pretty smart, Coach." Nick: "Unless someone has a better idea, let's rock." Rochelle: "And that'll signal the chopper pilot! Coach, that's brilliant! I'm sorry about all the bad stuff I said about your crappy band." Ellis: "I was born ready. So... yes." / "I always wanted to run to a helicopter during a guitar solo. Just like in a music video." Coach: "Then let's do it. Everybody grab a weapon, and let's go." Ellis: "So we gotta setup to rock, then fight zombies? What next? Dinosaurs flying down from the sky and shooting lasers out of their eyes?" / "So we gotta setup to rock, then fight zombies? This is the best day of my life!" Ellis: "I'm in. Let's rock and roll." / Nick: "Coach, that is the stupidest idea I've ever agreed with." Coach: "Then let's do it. Everybody grab a weapon, and let's go."
 * In the saferoom:
 * Coach: "Y'all know the Midnight Riders? They're gonna save us."
 * Coach: "Y'all know the Midnight Riders? They're gonna save us."
 * Coach: "Y'all know the Midnight Riders? They gonna save us. We start their finale, that chopper is gonna know something's up. Because nobody - and I mean nobody - has a bigger light show than the Midnight Riders."
 * Coach: "Y'all know the Midnight Riders? They gonna save us. We start their finale, that chopper is gonna know something's up. Because nobody - and I mean nobody - has a bigger light show than the Midnight Riders."
 * Coach: "I know how we can signal that chopper. (Cut: First we do a quick check around for corn dogs. (Nah, I'm just playin'.)) First we look for supplies. Then we start the Midnight Rider finale. It's all kinds of fireworks, smokepots, and lights and shit. That chopper pilot can't miss it. Ellis, you ready to rock?"
 * Coach: "I know how we can signal that chopper. First we look for supplies. Then we start the Midnight Rider finale. It's all kinds of fireworks, smokepots, and lights and shit. That chopper pilot can't miss it."
 * Coach: "Okay, here's the plan. It's been a long time since I seen the Riders, but if their finale's the same, that'll signal the chopper pilot. We just need to start it."
 * (Cut responses) "Midnight Rider's finale? That'll alert the goddamn chopper."
 * "These zombies better be ready to rock."
 * "I love the Riders. Nobody has a bigger finale than them. All we need to do is start it up, and the chopper pilot's sure as hell gonna see us."


 * At the stage
 * "There's the stage."
 * "Turn on the lights!"
 * "Cue the finale!"
 * "Hit the lights!"
 * "We need more lights!"


 * (Cut) "How do we start the finale?"
 * "We have to figure out how to turn all this stuff on."
 * "We need to start the finale!"


 * Approaching the microphone
 * "[singing] ...Gotta reach for the top, stay on that mountainnnn... dunh-nuh-NAH-nuh-NAH-nha!"

Ellis: "That don't matter. I could never hear the music over the pyrotechnics anyway." / "Lots of bands lip sync. Ain't nothing wrong with saving your vocal cords for the studio."
 * About to start the finale
 * "Start the finale!"
 * "Well ain't this a bitch, they got a tape for their music. To think I used to like these guys."
 * "Lip syncing old ass bitches, they got a tape back here."
 * "There's a tape back here, this is all setup for the finale."
 * "The Rider's have their finale all cued up back here."
 * "When I hit this tape deck, it's all gonna start. Get ready!"
 * "This tape's gonna start the finale! Get ready!"
 * "This is gonna be good!"
 * "When we start this tape, it's gonna be on. So get ready!"
 * "When we start this tape, get ready! The music's gonna be incredibly good, but try to focus."
 * "Get ready to rock, I'm gonna start the finale!"
 * "Finale's on! Get ready to rock!"


 * During a song
 * "Louder!"
 * "MORE! MORE! WE NEED MORE!"
 * "ROCK IT OUT!"
 * "Woooo! Midnight Riders RUUUUULE!"
 * "I love you, Midnight Riders!"
 * "I love this song! I love ALL these notes!"
 * "Come on Midnight Riders!"
 * "This music IS GREAT!"
 * "I forgot how much I like this song!"
 * "They nailed this damn song!"
 * "I ain't normally a rock music man, but damn I love the Riders!"
 * "Turn it up, I love this part!"
 * "Turn it up!"


 * When the chopper arrives
 * "The chopper saw us!"
 * "The chopper's coming!"
 * "The Midnight Riders saved us!"
 * "All right, Midnight Riders!"
 * "It's working!"
 * "I'll be damned! Even I didn't think that was gonna happen!"
 * "I'll be damned! Even I didn't think that was gonna work!"
 * (Cut responses to a scene where the pilot would say he can't land because of a Tank) "Kill the Tank so he can land!"
 * "We gotta kill the Tank before he lands!"
 * "You heard the man, kill the Tank!"

The Swamp
Nick: "This looks like a friendly place. They probably should have added no zombies to that sign." / Rochelle: "Well, we aren't CEDA or the military, so I guess we're welcome." Rochelle: "When they say stay out, I'm sure they mean someone else." Ellis: "Well, that ain't very friendly." Nick: "Great, we crash land in front of a village that hates everyone." Ellis: "OOOH man, that was some crazy shit. Nick, you are a man of action! ... Where the hell are we?" Nick: "I can't believe none of you were going to shoot him." Nick: "No problem, big guy, sorry about the landing." Ellis: "Guess our crash was so soft cause we landed in the swamp..." Ellis: "I'm just gonna say it. I don't like the swamp." Coach: "I don't think anyone likes the swamp." / "Come on now, if I was having a cookout, I ain't invitin' CEDA either." Nick: "This looks like a friendly place." Coach: "Come on now, if I was having a cookout, I ain't invitin' CEDA either." Nick: "Well, he wasn't doing a very good job once he became a zombie now was he?" Ellis: "True. True. He was a zombie. But he was also our only pilot." Nick: "I shot a zombie. He was a zombie, Ellis. He must have gotten bitten before he picked us up." Coach: "That's true. If I had a pick a low point in the flight, it was probably when he stopped flying the chopper and attacked us. Where in the hell are we?" Nick: "No problem, big guy, sorry about the landing." Coach: " Ahhh, I've had worse landings. Actually, that's a lie to spare your feelings. That crash was pretty bad."
 * Intro:
 * "Anyone check where we were before we went down?"
 * Coach: "No CEDA, No Military. Stay out."
 * Coach: "No CEDA, No Military. Stay out."
 * Coach: "That was the first time I was in a helicopter. I always imagined it with less zombies."
 * Coach: "That was some shit, the pilot becoming a zombie right before our eyes. Nice shooting, Nick."
 * Unused:
 * "You know what? No more helicopters. I'm just saying that now. I'm good."
 * "Next time someone wants to shoot our pilot, can I get a little warning?"
 * "Shit, that pilot just changed. One minute he was flying us to safety, the next he was... well... I am pretty damn sure he was trying to eat us."
 * Coach: "No CEDA, No Military. Stay out. I can see their point."
 * Coach: "No CEDA, No Military. Stay out."
 * Ellis: "Nick, what the hell, you shot the pilot!"
 * Coach: "That was some shit, the pilot becoming a zombie right before our eyes. Nice shooting, Nick."


 * Searching the houses
 * "Anything in those houses?"
 * "I ain't a prejudiced man, but-livin' in a swamp? That's sorta crazy."

Coach: "Nah, that don't sound good at all."
 * Approaching the river:
 * "I normally stay the hell away from swamps on principle. You remember that movie with that golfer that got his hand ate by a gator? That shit's real."
 * Rochelle: "Yeah, let's just cut through the gator park and visit the crazy militants in the swamp. Sound good?"

Rochelle: "What? Blood farmers? Boy, what in the hell are you talking about?" Ellis: "Duh? Farmers that don't grow crops, they grow people. To eat." Coach: "I seen that movie. It don't end well."
 * On the ferry
 * Ellis: "Listen up everybody. Be on the lookout for blood farmers. I'm serious."

Coach: "Yeah, don't wander off." / "Girl's got the right idea."
 * Entering the swamp
 * "Stay on the walk ways."
 * Rochelle: "Stay on the walkway!"

Ellis: "I had no plans on feeding the gators." / "I had no plans on feeding the gators, thank you very much."
 * Seeing the "Do not feed the gators" sign:
 * Coach: "Do not feed the gators."

Coach: "Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil." Ellis: "All right, all right, kinda hopin' you wouldn't get all biblical on me." / "Okay, kinda hopin' you weren't gonna get all fire and brimstone on me." / "Yeah? I'm walking through that valley kickin' (some) ass." / Nick: "Wow, Coach, that was uplifting." / "Well, Coach, that was uplifting. Everybody else motivated now?" / "Thanks, Coach, that was uplifting." Coach: "Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil." Nick: "Wow, Coach, that was uplifting." / "Well, Coach, that was uplifting. Everybody else motivated now?" / "Thanks, Coach, that was uplifting." Nick: "Nick, we're goin into a swamp filled with zombies. Y'all want me to lie to ya?"
 * Walking through the swamp:
 * Ellis: "All right, Coach, you got anything inspirational to say as we enter into the swamps?"
 * Ellis: "All right, Coach, you got anything inspirational to say as we enter into the swamps?"

Nick: "You did? Really?" / "What you? Really?" Ellis: "Oh yeah, when I had first holy communion in the second grade. (I don't think it fits anymore.)" Nick: "Pffft." Coach: "Nick, don't pay no attention to that boy." / "Heh, all right. Look at you, young'un, givin' Nick some shit right back." / "Look at you, young'un, givin' Nick some shit."
 * Ellis: "Hey Nick, I used to have a suit just like yours."

Rochelle: "That's an encouraging sign, they have power."
 * Approaching the saferoom:
 * Coach: "Into the drainage ditch."

Plank Country

 * In the saferoom:
 * "Man. When you're forced to turn to people livin' in a swamp to help you get out of a city? I don't think CEDA's doing their job right."

Rochelle: "A pirogue?" Ellis: "You don't know what a pirogue is?" Coach: "Ellis, it's just a boat." Ellis: "(Ha-ha/Yeah.) Very funny."
 * In the swamp:
 * "This swamp shit's gettin' old."
 * Ellis: "That's a nice pirogue." / "Over the tree by the pirogue."


 * Discovering the parachutist:
 * "Shit, why would you ever jump out of a plane?"


 * Discovering the plane wreckage:
 * "All right, now I understand why you would jump out of a plane."
 * "Looks like we weren't the only people crashing today."
 * "Nick, you didn't shoot this pilot too did you?"


 * About to open the emergency door:
 * "We gotta open this door."
 * "You know an alarm will sound when we open this."
 * "Everyone geared up?"
 * "This here is gonna set off an alarm, get ready."


 * Approaching the village:
 * "Hello!"
 * "Anyone there!?"
 * "Lights are on!"
 * "Anyone home!"
 * "Swamp people, we comin' home!"
 * "I wonder if they got dinner cookin'?"

Shanty Town
Coach: "It did not end well for these people." / "All right, this just makes me sad." Ellis: "Looks like they all headed off to a plantation." Coach: "Might as well head there as well." / "I don't want to stay here, let's follow 'em." Coach: "I don't want to think that, but I gotta agree."
 * In the saferoom:
 * "They headed to the river, sounds like a good idea."
 * Ellis: "Shit, man. They didn't make it."
 * Nick: "The swamp people didn't make it."
 * Nick: "This is ugly."


 * Exiting the saferoom:
 * "Careful lookin' for supplies, show respect."
 * "I don't think they'd mind if we look for supplies."


 * Exiting the swamp:
 * "I think we're at the end of the swamp."

The Plantation

 * Contacting for help via radio:
 * "Anyone out there?"
 * "Can anyone hear me?"
 * When Virgil makes his explosive arrival:
 * "Oh, shit! Gate open!"
 * "Our Cajun friend opened the gate!"
 * "Everyone to the boat!"
 * "Get to the boat!"
 * "Get your asses on the boat!"

Milltown

 * "Look here, the gas station's right across the street. We coulda already been there and back by now. Come on."
 * "C'mon, what gun bag? ...Oh, for—tell me we didn't forget the guns!"
 * "ME? I told Nick to grab the guns!"
 * "We should be in and out here. Get the gas, get back to shore, signal Virgil with the flare gun in the gun bag. Then we should just, uh...um...aw, hell. Tell me someone brought the gun bag!"
 * "Next gas two miles. Hope Virgil likes waitin', 'cause it looks we're goin' for a walk."
 * "Let's head to this Ducatel diesel."
 * "Outta gas. Shit."
 * "Alright, quit whinin'. We just gotta hike to this Duke-atel diesel."
 * "It's startin' to rain."
 * "First the plague, now the flood. I feel like I should be buildin' an ark."
 * "That's a nasty damn wreck."
 * "Don't think we got much choice in the matter.
 * "He's good people"
 * "Don't jinx us, Nick."
 * "Shit. All these zombies should help you swallow."
 * "Man, I sure wish the Burger Tank was open."
 * "I could go for a BBQ bacon burger, and a large order of fries, and an orange soda with no ice, and a piece of hot apple pie. Goddamn, I miss Burger Tank."
 * "Storms come up fast, but we should make it."
 * "Let's head to the sugar mill."

The Sugar Mill

 * "I am not dying in a goddamn sugar mill."
 * "Hurry up, people. We don't wanna get stuck out here in a storm."
 * "If this rain really comes, we gonna get washed away."
 * "We already got plague. Maybe the Lord'll let us slide on the flood."
 * "A whole lotta damn Witches up in this place."
 * "All these pale-assed crazy ladies are gettin' on my last nerve."
 * "Maybe the rain's bringin' them out."
 * "What the hell do THEY got to cry about? We're the ones getting attacked."
 * "Through the cane field!"
 * "Close the door and we can bust the cans outta this locker."
 * "So we gotta get past the sugar mill."
 * "Bitches every ten feet in this goddamn place."
 * "Dang. Bitches must like sugar."
 * "Goddammit, what with all these Witches."

Mill Escape

 * "Alright, people. Everybody got a can?"
 * "Let's head back to the boat."
 * "Getting' back to the boat ain't gonna be as easy as gettin' here."
 * "I told ya these storms come up quick."
 * "This shit is worse then the swamp."
 * [Upon seeing the flooded mill] "All that sugar it's a goddamn tragedy."

Return to Town

 * "The boat ain't far. One last push and we're outta here."
 * "Keep to high ground!"

Town Escape

 * "I have NEVER been so happy to see a Burger Tank! And believe me, I have been HAPPY to see some Burger Tanks!"
 * "If we fire up the Burger Tank sign, Virgil might see it."
 * "Burger Tank! Oh, we made it!"
 * "Better not be any goddamn instant mud people, just add water."
 * "Man, I ain't ever gonna be dry."
 * "Let's go almost back to the boat."
 * "GET TO THE BOAT!"

The Waterfront

 * "Thanks, Virgil. You stay safe, brother."
 * "We're almost home free, people."
 * "We made it REAL damn far, people. I'm proud of you. Now let's just cross that last mile."
 * "We BEEN through hell getting here. Now we're at the last mile. Let's make this COUNT."
 * "They're still flying jets!"
 * "Alright! military's still here!"
 * Nick: "Is that a good thing?"

The Park
"Good question. Where'n the hell is CEDA? Cause I'd sure like to shoot some-a their asses!" Nick: "Not good."
 * [After reading graffiti about CEDA] "Where is CEDA? Zombified.
 * [When the group learns that Nick's "bad feeling" was right]
 * "How does bein' so right feel, Nick?"
 * "These ain't zombies. Somebody's been shootin' people."
 * "I don't know shit. We gonna keep movin'."
 * "Warning: Alarm will sound if door is opened before clearance from tower."
 * "Alarm's gonna sound when we open the door."
 * "Through the bus station!"

The Cemetery

 * "Army abandoned this neighborhood."
 * [ When viewing the downed helicopter ] "Zombies didn't bring down that chopper."
 * [ When looking at the grafftti in the two-story building ] "There was some kinda war goin on out here."
 * [ When looking at the stick figures and marks ] "I hope those hash marks means zombies."
 * "Everyone into the sewer."
 * "Nick! Good news - we're going down into this sewer."
 * "Man Nick, you picked a bad day to wear your white suit."
 * Nick: "Tell me about it..."
 * "Alarms everywhere, people. Watch yourselves!"
 * [ If a player not as Coach sets off multiple car alarms ] "WOULD YOU STOP SHOOTIN' THE GODDAMN CARS?!"
 * [ When the jets blows up the freeway ] "MOTHERFU-"
 * [ After the jets blow up the freeway ] "Alright. Shit. Nobody panic. We gonna head down and find another way up onto the bridge."

The Quarter

 * "Man, they're lighting up this whole place. We gotta get to the bridge."
 * "STOP BOMBING US."
 * "Shit. Damn, that one was close!"
 * "There's a safe room in it!"

The Bridge
Coach: "We are NOT infected." Military: "Negative, Bridge—are you IMMUNE? Have you encountered the Infected?" Coach: "'Encountered'? Boy, I am covered in zombie blood and puke and eyeballs and twenty other parts I don't even recognize. We are immune as SHIT!" Nick: "Or, they're gonna line us up against the wall and shoot us." Coach: "Well, you free to make yourself a new life right here in this room, Nick." Nick: "Okay, alright, lets go."
 * [Contacting the military via radio]
 * Military: "Bridge, are you immune?"
 * [Upon reaching the beginning of The Bridge] "Oh yeah...our goal is right next to the bridge! ON THE OTHER MOTHER-EFFIN' SIDE OF THE WATER!"
 * [Bridge saferoom]
 * Coach: "Alrightalrightalright. We gonna stroll across that bridge, and the army's gonna take care of us."
 * "Those sound like soldiers! Somebody talk to 'em."
 * "Somebody pick up the radio."
 * "We gotta lower that drawbridge."
 * "You want to TEST me? I been through HELL to get to here! You are NOT the one to take me down!"
 * "I walked through a WORLD OF SHIT to get here! I am not gonna die now! I am NOT gonna DIE NOW!"
 * [reviving a Survivor during the Bridge Gauntlet] "We are TOO CLOSE! I am NOT gonna let you die here!"

Misc.

 * [ When seeing a riot zombie ]: "That zombie's got armor. I WANT ARMOR!"
 * [ Reading the sign at the start of The Parish ] "'Infected detected in this area'? No shit."
 * [reading a sign]
 * "'Stay in your group.' That's what I keep sayin'!"
 * "This shit says, 'Use of Deadly Force Authorized'." "Shit, it sure is."
 * [laughing] "Form orderly line."
 * Coach: "'Restricted Area'."
 * Nick: "Restricted area, my ass…"

Scavenge

 * [ At the beginning of a Scavenge map ] "Haul ass and get gas!"
 * "Let's GO! Find the gas cans!"
 * [ When the Survivors win ] "YEEEAH!"