Nick/Quotes

A list of Nick's Quotes heard so far in Left 4 Dead 2.

Intro

 * [Seeing Ellis being ridden by a Jockey]
 * "Ah, shit!"
 * [When Coach's complains about climbing stairs]
 * "Come on, Coach! Maybe the helicopter... Maybe it's made of chocolate!"
 * [Seeing how the helicopters flee the area]
 * "Looks like there's been a change of plans..."
 * [Pulling Ellis away from the zombies attacking him, including a Smoker]
 * "No!"
 * [As intro comes to a close, in background]
 * "I have not... Come this far... To die now."

Alternate Lines
[The game files include unused intro voice clips.]
 * "Looks like they're coming back to finish the job." (4 versions)
 * "Looks like they came back to finish the job." (3 versions)
 * "I guess there's been a change of plans." (2 versions)
 * "Looks like there's been a change of plans." (2 versions)
 * "Looks like their plans have changed." (2 versions)
 * "There's been a change of plans." (2 versions)
 * "Looks like we're not part of their new plan."

Seeing a Safe Room

 * "Safehouse!"
 * "We got a safehouse!"
 * "Safehouse ahead!"
 * "There's the safehouse!"

No Casualties

 * "I'm starting to like you guys!"
 * "You guys aren't so damn bad!"
 * "Happy New Year!"
 * (This references Francis' use of "Merry Christmas")
 * "And THAT is how you do it!"
 * "That, my friends, is how you do it!"
 * "Take that, you mealy-mouthed bastards!"

With Casualties

 * "That was a little too close..."
 * "That was way... too... close."
 * "That was way, way too close."
 * "That was a close one."
 * "Man, we got lucky."
 * "We got lucky."
 * "Goddamn, that was close."
 * "We made that by the skin of our teeth."
 * "At least I made it!"
 * "Well that was unpleasant."

Waiting For Others Inside Safe Room

 * "Don't make me come out there for ya!"
 * "Everybody inside!"
 * "Inside now!"
 * "Get inside!" (2 versions)
 * "Quit screwing around, get inside."
 * "Quit screwing around, let's get inside."

All Survivors In Safe Room, Door Open

 * "Close the door." (3 versions)
 * "Close that door." (2 versions)
 * "Don't forget to close the door." (2 versions)
 * "Somebody got the door?" (2 versions)
 * "I think we should be closing doors."
 * "Lets try closing doors behind us."

Telling Survivors to Back Up

 * "Back it up!" (2 versions)
 * "Back, back, back!"
 * "C'mon, back!"
 * [Quiet]
 * "Back up."
 * "Everyone back."
 * "Lets get back."
 * "Back up, back up."

Telling Survivors to Go

 * "Go!" (4 versions)
 * "Go, go, go!"
 * "Let's go, lets go!"
 * "Let's go!" (2 versions)
 * "Everybody keep moving."
 * "Just go."
 * "Just go, go."
 * "Don't stop, don't stop."
 * "Keep moving."

Telling Survivors to Stay Close

 * "Stay close."
 * "Stay together, people."
 * "Keep close."
 * "Yeah, of course, stay together."

Interrupting Ellis
[These quotes are used by Nick at various times when Ellis begins to tell a story]
 * "Ellis? Why don't you just tell us this in the chopper?"
 * "Ellis? Ellis, Ellis!"
 * "Hey Ellis, why don't you tell us about the time you shut up!"
 * "Ellis? Is now the best time?"
 * "Um... I don't care. Nobody cares."
 * "Ellis, if I listen to this, will this be the last one?"
 * "Oh Jesus, is there a Witch around here we can piss off?"
 * "Oh, not again!"
 * "Glad you shared that, Ellis."
 * "And your point is...?"
 * "[Chuckling] You know what I like best about your stories, Ellis? The sound they make when they stop."
 * "You know what I like best about your stories, Ellis? Nothing!"
 * "Why don't we just try quiet time for awhile?"
 * "Hey Ellis? Shut up contest. Ready? One two three go!"
 * "Ellis, Ellis! We don't have time for that right now!"
 * "Ellis, Is now the best time?"

Alone

 * "Helloooo?" (2 versions)
 * "Heyooo?"
 * "Anybody hear me?"
 * "Can you guys hear me?"

Directional Instructions

 * "Through here/there."
 * "This way."
 * "In here."
 * "Down here."
 * "C'mon, this way."
 * "Through this/that window."
 * "Down this/that alley."
 * "Let's go through here/there."
 * "Through this/that door."
 * "We can go through this restaurant."
 * "Through that/this gate."
 * "Up that/this/the ladder."
 * "Down that/this ladder."
 * "Ladder!"
 * "We got a ladder."
 * "Over this/that fence."
 * "To/Over the bridge!"
 * "We can cross here/there."
 * "We can get up here/there."
 * "We can get down here/there."
 * "Over this/that door."
 * "Jump down here/there."
 * "There's a safe room up here/there."
 * "Straight forward. This isn't so bad."
 * "Down the street."
 * "Get on!"
 * "Come on, you can make it!"
 * "Just a little more!"

Miscellaneous Crescendo Event Instructions

 * "Hit it."
 * "Press the button."
 * "Do it."
 * "Activate it."
 * "I hit it."
 * "I did it."

Cheering

 * "Goddamn right!" (2 versions)
 * "Baby!"
 * "Yes!" (3 versions)
 * "Hell yeah!" (2 versions)
 * "Damn right!"
 * "Awesome!"
 * "Straight!" (2 versions)

Alarmed Car

 * "Don't shoot that car!"

Commands
These are derived from the PC commands when using the Z or X keys.

Yes

 * "Yeppers."
 * "Yesssss."
 * "Yes; yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."
 * "Yes."
 * "Yeah."

No

 * "Yeah, no."
 * "No." (6 versions)
 * "Nope." (3 versions)
 * "No-Siree-Bob."
 * "Uh-uh."
 * [to Ellis]
 * "Try again, champ."
 * "Try again, little man."
 * [to Rochelle]
 * "No sweetie."
 * "No way, sweetie."

Distant

 * "Over there." (3 versions)
 * "Look." (4 versions)

Nearby

 * "Look at this." (2 versions)
 * "Check it out." (2 versions)
 * "Look here." (2 versions)

Looking at another Survivor

 * [Coach]
 * "Coach!" (12 versions)


 * [Rochelle]
 * "Rochelle." (6 versions)
 * "Ro." (6 versions)
 * [Dead Center only]
 * "Hey you." (3 versions)
 * "Hey sweetheart."
 * "Sweetheart."
 * "Hey sweetie." (3 versions)
 * "Sweetie." (2 versions)
 * "Hey honey." (3 versions)


 * [Ellis]
 * [Chuckling] "Are you kidding me Ellis? Come on."
 * "Ellis." (13 versions)
 * "Overalls." (2 versions)
 * "Hey Ellis, you like 'taters?"
 * "Goober." (3 versions)
 * "Cletus." (2 versions)
 * "Hey Cletus."
 * "Cooter." (3 versions)
 * [Dead Center only]
 * "Dude." (4 versions)
 * "Kid." (6 versions)
 * "Hey kid."

Argh

 * "Dumbshit!" (2 versions)
 * "This is all going to Hell!" (2 versions)
 * "Goddammit!" (2 versions)
 * "Damn!" (2 versions)
 * "Screw this!"
 * "What an assclown."
 * "Shit." (2 versions)
 * "BITCH!"
 * "TITS!" (2 versions)
 * "Bullshit!" (3 versions)
 * "This is bullshit!"
 * "Bastards." (2 versions)
 * "Holy shit!" (2 versions)
 * "Son of a bitch!" (3 versions)
 * "My ass!" (2 versions)
 * "Is this some kind of sick joke?" (2 versions)
 * "I call foul!"
 * "Kiss my ass!" (3 versions)
 * "Ass!"
 * "Asshat!"
 * "Asshole!"
 * "Assclown!"

Taunt

 * "Take that, you mealy-mouthed bastards!"
 * "Stick that where the sun don't shine!"
 * "Candyasses!"
 * "You don't stand a chance!"
 * "Suck on that!"
 * "Give up now!?"
 * "Stick that up your ass!"
 * "Stick it up your ass!"
 * "We are wiping the floor with you!"

Follow Me

 * "This way." (2 versions)
 * "Over here."
 * "Follow me." (3 versions)
 * "C'mon this way." (2 versions)
 * "Keep up." (3 versions)
 * "Okay, this way."

You Take the Lead

 * "Lead on." (3 versions)
 * "I'm right behind you."
 * "Right behind you." (2 versions)
 * "Lead on, Macduff."
 * "Yeah, you go first."
 * "Lead on, smart guy."

Ready

 * "Ok, we ready?"
 * "We ready?" (5 versions)
 * "Everybody ready?"
 * "Ready?" (2 versions)
 * "Everyone ready?"
 * "Are you guys ready?"
 * "You think you can handle this?"
 * "If you aren't ready, I don't wanna hear it."

Good job

 * "Impressive."
 * "Nice shot, Ace."
 * "Howdja... do that?"
 * "Great shot."
 * [To Rochelle ]
 * "Damn, Rochelle."
 * "Rochelle... damn."
 * "ACES!"
 * "Nice Shot!"

Thank you

 * "I owe you one."
 * "Thanks." (2 versions)
 * "Thank you."
 * "Thanks man, I owe you."
 * "Thanks, Ro." (To Rochelle)
 * "Thanks, Bro." (To Coach)
 * "Thanks, Killer." (To Ellis)

Let's Go

 * "Let's go."
 * "Look at you. What are we waiting for, let's go."
 * "Let's roll."
 * "Time to move."
 * "What are we waiting for? Let's go."

Hurrah

 * "We are walking through the valley of the shadow of death, and kicking ass!"
 * "It may not be pretty, but we're doing this."
 * "You guys aren't so damn bad."
 * "What do you know? We're gonna make it."
 * "You guys are pretty good!"
 * "Aces!"
 * "I'm starting to like you guys!"
 * "We're making it look easy!"
 * "And that is how you do that!"
 * "We're the four riders of the goddamn apocalypse!"
 * "And that is how you do it!"

Hurry

 * "C'mon, I'm in a hurry!" (2 versions)
 * "Hurry it up!"
 * "Let's go, let's go!"
 * "Move, move, move!"

I'm With You

 * "I'm here."
 * "Why not? I follow you."
 * "I'm with you."
 * "Sure thing, let's go."
 * "Sure, let's go."

Laughter

 * [Laughter commands do not include words. There are 17 laughter variants.]

Nice Job

 * "Well alright." (2 versions)
 * "Nice job." (2 versions)
 * "That was surprisingly good."
 * "Nice." (3 versions)
 * "That's what I like to see."
 * "Wow. Nice."

Sorry

 * "Excuse me." (2 versions)
 * "Forgive me, ok?"
 * "Well sorry."
 * "I'm sorry. Is that what you want me to say?"
 * "I'm sorry, ok?"
 * "Can you forgive me?"
 * "Don't look at me like that."

I'll Save You

 * "Relax, relax, I'm coming."
 * "I'm on my way." (2 versions)
 * "Hold on, I'm coming."

Wait

 * "Wait."
 * "Don't move from this spot."
 * "Stay here."
 * "Just stay here."
 * "Wait here."

Be Careful

 * "Everybody be careful."
 * "Let's be careful."
 * "Try and be careful."

Taking

 * "I'll hold on to this first aid kit."
 * "I need this." (2 versions)
 * "Grabbing first aid."
 * "First aid kit."

Spotting

 * "First aid kit here!"
 * "First aid here!"
 * "First aid!"
 * [Multiple kits]
 * "First aid kits here!"
 * "First aid kits!"

Healing Self

 * "I'm gonna heal."
 * "I Gotta heal."
 * "Gonna heal."
 * "Gonna patch myself up."
 * "Wait up, gonna fix myself up."
 * "Wait—healing!"
 * "Okay, hang on. I'm gonna fix myself up."
 * "Just wait a sec. Healing."
 * "Healing!" (4 versions)
 * "Hold up, gonna heal." (2 versions)

Healed

 * "Ahhh... Better."
 * "That worked."
 * "Alright, now I'm back."
 * "Okay."
 * "Ooh, yea."
 * "Ahhh..."
 * "Better."

Telling Survivor to Heal

 * "Heal up." (2 versions)
 * "It's a good time to heal."
 * "This would be a good time to heal."
 * "Maybe you could heal up now."
 * "Heal if you need to."
 * "This might be a good time to heal."
 * "Time for people to heal." (2 versions)
 * "Don't forget, you can heal yourself."
 * "This is a good time to heal."
 * [to Coach]
 * "Coach, you should heal." (2 versions)
 * "Coach, don't forget about that health kit."
 * "Hey Coach, heal." (2 versions)
 * "Coach, you should maybe heal."
 * [to Ellis]
 * "Ellis, heal up."
 * "Time to heal, Ellis."
 * "C'mon Ellis, don't be a hero, use your health kit." (2 versions)
 * [to Rochelle]
 * "Rochelle, you don't look so good." (2 versions)
 * "Rochelle, we need you. Heal up." (2 versions)
 * "Hey Ro, don't forget about that health kit." (2 versions)

Attempting to Heal Survivor

 * "Stop, I've got something for ya." (2 versions)
 * "Hang on, you need this more than me." (2 versions)
 * "Hold up, you can have this." (2 versions)

Healing Survivor

 * "Now don't waste this by getting pounced on or something."
 * (Note: the subtitles don't have the "on" after pounced.)
 * "Let doctor Nick fix ya up."
 * "You're a mess... stand still."
 * "Hold on, let me heal you."
 * "I should probably save this for me, but... what the hell."
 * (Note: this line is often used when Nick himself is on low health and goes to heal another Survivor, but it can be used when Nick is in high health as well.)
 * "Just hang on, let me heal ya."
 * "Hold on, hold on."
 * "We don't have time, stop moving."
 * "Cover us while I heal you."
 * "I'm gonna heal you, keep shooting."
 * "Keep 'em off us while I heal you."
 * [Specific for The Hotel]
 * "Alright, don't tell the others I'm doing this... I'm only doing this for you."
 * "Hold still, I'm probably gonna regret this, but let me use this on you."
 * "Hold still, I've done this before."
 * "Quit moving around, I've seen worse."
 * "Man up for a minute, I'm gonna fix you up."

Spotting

 * "Pills here!" (3 versions)
 * "We got pills here." (2 versions)

Taking

 * "I got pills."
 * "I can always use these."
 * "I'll hold on to these pills."
 * "Pills."

Using

 * "Ah, a little pick me up."
 * "A little pick me up, that's good."
 * "Okay. Now to find me some real first aid."
 * "Okay, that's gonna last for a bit."

Spotting

 * "Adrenaline shot here!"

Taking

 * "Grabbing a shot!"

Giving Pills/Adrenaline

 * "It is more blessed to give than to receive."
 * "Have this."
 * "Just take this."
 * "This is for you."
 * "Here, I don't need this."
 * "Take it, just take it."
 * "Take this!"
 * "Grab this!"
 * "Take it!"
 * [Dead Center exclusive]
 * "Hey you, take this."
 * "Hey what's-your-name, here you go."

Spotting

 * "Got some chest paddles."
 * "Defib unit here!"
 * "Got a defib unit."
 * "Chest paddles here!"
 * "Defibrillator here!"

Saved by Defibrillator

 * "AHH! Stop shocking me!"
 * "AHH... Right, that was some serious shit!"

Reviving Another Survivor with the Defibrillator

 * "Clear!"
 * "Come on!" (2 versions)
 * "Work, damn it!" (2 versions)

Slipped Off Of Ledge

 * "Guys, I seem to have slipped!"
 * "I'm hanging here!"
 * "Hey, gimme a hand!"
 * "I need a hand!"

Hanging From Ledge

 * "Get your asses over here and help me!"
 * "Somebody needs to help me up!"
 * "Don't be leaving me here, dammit, help!"

Still Hanging

 * "I'm hanging over here!"
 * "Don't even think of leaving me here!"
 * "Could use a hand over here!"
 * "Could use some help here!"

Hand Slips from Ledge (unused)

 * "Woah!" (3 versions)
 * "Ah!"
 * "Hey!"

Falling

 * "Heeeeeeeelp!" (2 versions)
 * "Noooooo!"
 * "Whoooooah!"

Low Health

 * "Goddammit, goddammit, god... dammit!"
 * "Don't worry, don't worry... I'm not done yet."
 * "What was I thinking coming down here?"
 * "If I go, you guys are gonna miss me!"
 * "I have seriously felt better."
 * "Pull yourself together, man. You're [grunts in pain] fallin' apart!"
 * "This is not [grunts in pain] how it's gonna end."
 * "You're gonna have to do better than that to kill me!"
 * "I am sick... and tired... of being sick and tired."
 * "Ain't this a bitch."
 * "Well, at least I didn't catch the flu."
 * "This is some crap."
 * "I gotta take better (grunts) care of myself."
 * "Okay, alright, I can do this... I can do this..."
 * "Argh, I really screwed the pooch back there."
 * "Goddammit, I can't believe this."
 * "Not dead yet, but not exactly healthy."
 * "Don't worry about me, I'll be ok."
 * "I'm not dead yet."
 * "Quit being a baby, you've felt worse after a night of drinking."
 * "I am not gonna die down here."
 * "I'm not dyin' in the middle of nowhere."
 * "I really screwed the pooch back there."

Black and White

 * "I'm not going to make it much longer, my friends... I am seriously screwed up!"
 * "Well, boys, this looks like it for me!"
 * "Doesn't this beat all... I'm about to die!"
 * "Alright, I gotta call uncle here. I need some help."
 * "Man, man... It's been a long time since I felt this bad."

Responding to Survivors inside Safe room

 * [When the other survivors are in the safe room]
 * "Can't you see I'm limpin' here?" (2 versions
 * "I'm trying to hurry!"
 * "I'm goin' as fast as I can!"
 * [When low on health in Swamp Fever]
 * "I am not going to become gator food..."
 * "I am not going to die in this swamp..."
 * '[When low on health in Hard Rain]
 * "Never get out of the boat. Never get out of the boat. Never get out of the boat." (a reference to Apocalypse Now)
 * "What the hell were we thinking stopping here?"
 * "Some milk run this turned out to be."
 * [From the Zombie Survival Guide Trailer/When low on health on The Parish]
 * "I have not... come this far... to die now!"
 * "I am not... going to die... in this city."

Reviving Another Survivor

 * [Asking a Survivor how they're doing]
 * "Lemme look at you."
 * "You gonna be ok?"
 * "Are you gonna be ok?"
 * "How you holding up?"
 * "Easy there, fireball, easy."
 * "Easy there, fireball."
 * "You hurt?"
 * "Everything working?"
 * "You in one piece?"
 * "You're not gonna die on me, are you?"
 * "Are you gonna die?"
 * "You gonna make it?"
 * "You ok?" (2 versions)
 * "Ok?" (2 versions)
 * "You good?" (2 versions)
 * "We... I... need you for a little longer, so let's get you back on your feet."
 * "Come on, get up. You're not dead yet."
 * "Come on, get up. Get up, you're not dead yet."
 * "It seems like every time I turn around, you are down on the ground, now let's get you up."
 * "We can't afford to lose you...yet. So let's get you up."
 * "This is nothing. You're gonna be as good as new once I get you up."
 * "You have to learn to take care of yourself, or you'll keep ending up down here."
 * "You have to take better care of yourself. Now let's get you up."
 * "Come on, pull yourself together. We gotta get you up."
 * "Look at you laying there. It's time to get up."
 * "If I get you up, you promise not to shoot me anymore?"
 * "Come on, I've seen worse, let's get your butt up."
 * "It's a miracle you lasted this long, let's get you on your feet."
 * "Settle down, settle down, everything's gonna be ok."
 * "I'm not gonna leave you behind, let's get you up."
 * "You're tougher than you look. Let's get you back on your feet."
 * "Relax, you're gonna be ok, I've seen a lot worse, come on."
 * "Don't worry, don't worry, I can get you back up."
 * "Alright, don't worry, don't worry, I can get you back up."
 * "This is nothin'. You'll be as good as new once I get you up."
 * "Come on, still lot's to be done."
 * "Rise and shine."
 * "Let's hit the road."
 * "Here we go."
 * "Up and at 'em."
 * "Let's roll."
 * "You owe me one."
 * "Let's have a look at you."
 * "Time to get some revenge." (2 versions)
 * "Let's go."
 * "See? All good."
 * "Good as new."
 * "Let's go kill some zombies."
 * [Reviving Coach]
 * "Get up, you aren't leaving me with those two."
 * "Get up, please? You aren't leaving me with those two."
 * [Reviving Ellis]
 * "Come on champ, let's get you on your feet, you'll be ok." (2 versions)
 * [Reviving a Survivor after incapacitating them with friendly fire]
 * "Let me say- look, if I did this, I'm- I- [pause] I apologize."
 * "I'll just, if I did this, I'm sorry."

Helping a Survivor off a ledge

 * "Don't worry, I'll bail your ass out of this mess."
 * "Easy there, fireball. Let's get you up."
 * "Did you miss me? C'mon, let's get you up."
 * "I gotcha, just relax, lemme get you up."

Reviving Another Survivor While Under Attack

 * "Get up, get up, get up!"
 * "Aw shit, get up, get up!"
 * "Ah shit, come on, come on, come on." (2 versions)
 * "We don't have time for this, get up!"
 * "Time to move, let's go!"
 * "Let's go, on your feet, let's go!"

Reviving Another Survivor On Last Down

 * "You're starting to worry me. I can get you up, but you go down again, and that's it."
 * "You seriously cannot go down again, 'kay? 'Cause if you do... you're not going to make it."
 * "I can't lie to you, you are messed up. If you don't get yourself healed up, that's it."

Incapacitated

 * "I'm down!" (2 versions)
 * "Down!" (2 versions)

Still Incapacitated

 * "I need some help!"
 * "I can't do this on my own, could use some help!"
 * "Somebody wanna lend me a hand here?"
 * "Help!"
 * "Hey, over here!"

Revived

 * [Responding to a Survivor asking how he is]
 * "Same as always."
 * "You tell me."
 * "I'm not exactly 'great'".
 * "I'm cool. I'm cool."
 * "I'm good, I'm good. Get me up."
 * "Don't worry about me."
 * "Good enough."
 * "I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine."
 * "Oh, I'm fine."
 * "Well, what do I look like?"
 * "Oh, I'm super."
 * "I've been better!"
 * "Just get me up... please..."
 * "I'll be fine."
 * [Sarcastic] "Oh I'm great."
 * "Fan-freakin'-tastic. That's how I am."
 * "I'll live, let's go."
 * "I've been better." (2 versions)
 * "Don't worry, just get me up."
 * [When revived by Rochelle]
 * "Thanks, Ro."
 * [When revived by Ellis]
 * "Thanks, killer."
 * [When revived by Coach]
 * "Thanks, bro."

Survivor death

 * "Ah, SHIT!"
 * "We just screwed our odds..."
 * "I think... we just became longshots."

Two dead Survivors

 * "Well shit, we're a twosome for here on out."
 * "Looks like it's just you and me."
 * "Hey Ellis? Don't let me down."
 * (Used when both Rochelle and Coach are dead)

Rochelle

 * "Good night, Rochelle."
 * "There goes repopulating the Earth."
 * "Ah shit, Rochelle."
 * "Rochelle."
 * [In The Hotel, while unfamiliar]
 * "I can think of two other people I would have rather seen go first."
 * "Guys? What are we gonna do now?"

Coach

 * "Shit, Coach... I'll miss ya."
 * "Later, Coach..."
 * "Ah... Coach..."
 * [In The Hotel, while unfamiliar]
 * "Goddamn it, Coach, what'd you leave me with?" (2 versions)
 * "I'm gonna miss you, big guy."

Ellis

 * "Hey Ellis y'know that shit I was sayin'? I was just joking, right?"
 * "Ah... Ellis..."
 * "Ellis..."
 * "Ellis, I'm surprised you lasted as long as you did."
 * [In The Hotel, while unfamiliar]
 * "He was annoying, but he could shoot a gun." (2 versions)
 * "No time for mourning, let's go."
 * [When both Coach and Rochelle are dead]
 * "Hey Ellis, you know all those things I said? I was kidding."

Trapped in a Rescue Closet

 * "Someone wanna come get me outta here?"
 * "You guys out there? Come and get me!"
 * "I need somebody's help for just five seconds!"
 * "Can one of you people come and get me? Please?"
 * "I'm trapped in a room!"
 * "I cannot get out of here by myself!"
 * "Come on, guys, get me out of here!"
 * "Just this once I need some help!"
 * "You know I'm going to be a big help, just get me out of here!"
 * "I'm no use to anyone in here, get me out of here!"
 * "Goddamnit, I am stuck in here, get me out!"
 * "Alright, who's available to get me out of here?"

Team kill (unused)

 * "Don't you think we should be killing the zombies instead?"
 * "What in the hell kinda strategy is that?"
 * "WHAT?! This is hard enough without you helping the freaks!"

General

 * "Everybody grab a weapon!"
 * "Weapons over here!"
 * "Guns here."

Ammunition

 * "Ammo here." (3 versions)
 * "Ammo." (2 versions)

Reloading

 * "Reloading!" (13 versions)
 * "Reloading here!"
 * "Gotta reload!"

Any Melee Weapon

 * "Nice!"
 * "Hell yeah."
 * "This feels good."
 * "This could be fun."
 * "Can save some bullets with this one."
 * "That'll come in handy."
 * "I am going to beat the shit outta something with this."

Axe

 * "A freakin' axe!"
 * "Axe."

Baseball Bat

 * "This is nice. I'm gonna crack some heads with it."
 * "I'm gonna crack some heads with this."
 * Nick: "This brings back some good memories."
 * Coach: "You play ball, Nick?"
 * Nick: "Nope. Bouncer at a club."

Frying pan

 * "A skillet!"
 * "This'll work."
 * "Gonna bonk some heads with this!"
 * "Frying pan!"

Cricket Bat

 * "Gonna whack the shit outta somethin' with this!"
 * "I am gonna whack the shit outta somethin' with this!"
 * "Got a Cricket Bat!"
 * "Cricket bat here!"

Machete

 * "Machete here."
 * "Got a machete."

Golf Club

 * "Grabbin' a driver!
 * "Club here."
 * "Golf club."
 * "Grabbin' a golf club."
 * "Driver!"
 * "FORE!"

Katana

 * "Ninja sword here!"
 * "Grabbin' a sword!"

Chainsaw

 * "Chainsaw here!"
 * "Got a Chainsaw!"

Rampaging with Chainsaw

 * "DIE, DIE!"
 * "SUCK ON THIS!"
 * "YEAH! DIE!"
 * "YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"

Crowbar

 * "Crowbar!"


 * "Grabbin' a crowbar!"
 * "I cannot WAIT to find a crate!"

Nightstick

 * "Nightstick here!"
 * "Grabbin' a nightstick!"

Guitar

 * "Guitar here!"
 * "Grabbin' a guitar!"

Magnum

 * "Niiiiiiice!"
 * "Hell yeah!"

P220 Pistol

 * "Grabbing the pistol."
 * "Pistol."
 * "Second pistol."

Grenade Launcher

 * "Grenade launcher here!"
 * "Time to make some zombie soup."
 * "Hell yeah, grenade launcher!"
 * "Got a grenade launcher!"

M60

 * "Shit, this is heavy."
 * "Shit. Now this is a gun!"
 * "Now this is a gun."
 * "Big gun!"
 * "I'm grabbin' the big gun."
 * "Grabbin' the chain gun!"

Assault Rifle and Variants

 * "Taking the rifle." (2 versions)
 * "Grabbing the assault rifle." (2 versions)
 * "Assault rifle."

Auto Shotgun and Combat Shotgun

 * "I got the shotgun."
 * "Shotgun for me."
 * "Taking the shotgun."
 * "Shotgun."

Pump Shotgun and Chrome Shotgun

 * "Going with the shotgun."
 * "Shotgun."
 * "Taking the shotgun."

Sniper Rifle and Hunting Rifle

 * "Sniper for me." (2 versions)
 * "I'll snipe." (2 versions)

Submachine Gun and Silenced Submachine Gun

 * "Taking the machine gun."
 * "Going with the machine gun."

Spotting

 * "There's a pipe bomb here."
 * "Pipe bomb!"
 * "Pipe bombs!"
 * "Grab a pipe bomb."
 * "Pipe bomb here."

Taking

 * "Grabbing a pipe bomb."
 * "Pipe bomb."

Throwing

 * "Pipe bomb out!" (2 versions)
 * "Chase this, you zombie bastards!"
 * "Grenade!"
 * "Throwing a pipe bomb!" (2 versions)
 * "Pipe bomb!"

Spotting

 * "Molotov here."
 * "Molotovs."
 * "We got Molotovs."

Taking

 * "Grabbin' a Molotov."
 * "Molotov."

Throwing

 * "Throwing a Molotov!" (2 versions)
 * "Fire coming!"
 * "Molotov!"
 * "Lighting it up!" (2 versions)

Spotting

 * "Is that a bottle of puke?"
 * "That can't be a bottle of puke, is it?" (Dead Center only)
 * "Boomer Bile here!"

Taking

 * "Grabbin' a bile jar!"
 * "Grabbin' puke!"
 * [Supplemental: said after the regular quote on Dead Center only]
 * "...for some reason."
 * "I can't believe I just said that."

Throwing

 * "Incoming!"
 * "Fight amongst yourselves!"
 * "Puke in the hole!"

Explosive Ammunition

 * "Grabbin' some frag rounds!"
 * "Explosive rounds here!"
 * "Frag rounds here!"
 * "Deploying frag rounds."

Spotting

 * "Fire bullets here!"

Taking

 * "Grabbin' fire bullets!"

Deploying

 * "Everybody grab some incendiary ammo!"
 * "Let's start some fires, people!"
 * "Deploying fire bullets!"

Laser Sight

 * "Laser sights here!" (2 versions)
 * "We got some laser sights!"

Horde Alerted

 * "This is why we've got guns!"
 * "Goddammit, it's gettin' good!"
 * "It's about to get serious!"
 * "We got inbound!"
 * "They're comin'!"
 * "Here they come!"
 * "Get ready!"

Infected Behind the Survivors

 * "They're behind us!"
 * "Behind us!" (2 versions)
 * "Behind!"

Killing a Special Infected

 * "Got it!" (3 versions)
 * "It's dead!"
 * "Dead." (2 versions)
 * "Got 'em." (2 versions)
 * "Done like dinner."
 * "Bulls-eye." (2 versions)
 * "That's a hit!"
 * "Hit!"
 * [Responding to Ellis claiming a kill]
 * "I don't think so Ellis."

Another Survivor Killed a Special Infected

 * "Nice shot!" (4 versions)
 * "How'd you... do that?"
 * "Good shooting."
 * "Nice shooting."
 * "Nice shot, ace."
 * "Impressive."
 * "Alright, Coach." (2 versions)
 * "You're getting the hang of this, Ellis." (2 versions)
 * "Damn, Rochelle!"
 * "Rochelle... damn!"
 * "Damn, Rochelle, nice!"

Zombie Behind Another Survivor

 * "Look out!"
 * "Watch out!"
 * "Head's up!"

Hearing

 * "You hear that Boomer?" (2 versions)
 * "You hear that Boomer? Don't let him spew on you."
 * "Boomer around. Don't shoot him if he's near me. Okay?"
 * "Keep a lookout, I hear a Boomer."
 * "I hear a Boomer."

Spotting
[Dead Center]
 * "Boomer!" (4 versions)
 * "We got a Boomer!" (2 versions)
 * "Goiter man!"
 * "Aunt Bee!"
 * "Fat guy!" (2 versions)
 * "Fatty!"
 * "Watch out for the- the big, fat thing!"
 * "It's the fat barf bag!"
 * "That's what they call a Boomer!"

Vomited on

 * "I'm blind!"
 * "Oh, goddammit!"
 * "Argh, this is nasty shit!"
 * "Godammit. I am covered in vomit again."

Hearing

 * "Keep your eyes peeled, I hear a Charger."
 * "I hear a Charger." (2 versions)
 * "Charger around, get ready." (2 versions)
 * "You hear that Charger?" (2 versions)

Spotting
[Dead Center]
 * "Charger!" (3 versions)
 * "We got a Charger!"
 * "Hillbilly!"
 * "Overalls!"
 * "One Arm!"
 * "It's that thing that runs at you!"
 * "I'm guessing that's a Charger!"

Being Pummeled

 * "Shoot the big guy pounding me into the ground!"
 * "Can someone shoot this goddamn thing?!"
 * "This thing is beatin' my ass!"
 * "Kill this goddamn thing!"
 * "Shoot him! Shoot him!"
 * "The Charger's got me!"
 * "Shoot the Charger!"
 * "Kill the Charger!"

Hearing

 * "I hear a Hunter."
 * "Pay attention, there's a Hunter around."
 * "You hear that Hunter?"

Spotting
[Dead Center]
 * "We got a Hunter!" (2 versions)
 * "Hunter!" (3 versions)
 * "Scrawny little bitch I'm gonna kill!"
 * "Jumper!"
 * "Leaper!"
 * "It's that fast bastard that jumps at you!"
 * "I think they call those things Hunters!"

Pounced on

 * "GET IT OFF ME!" (5 versions)
 * "GET IT OFF!" (5 versions)
 * "GET IT- GET IT-" (2 versions)

Survivor is Pounced
[Dead Center]
 * "Hunter on [name of Survivor]!"
 * "Hunter's got [name of Survivor]!"
 * "Zombie on 'em!"
 * "Zombie on her!"
 * "Get that zombie off 'em!"

Hearing

 * "One of those little Jockey bastards is around." (2 versions)
 * "Jockeys' around..." (2 versions)
 * "I can hear a Jockey." (2 versions)

Spotting
[Dead Center]
 * "Jockey!" (3 versions)
 * "Little freak!"
 * "Little guy!" (2 versions)
 * "It's that little Jockey bastard!"
 * "I think they're called Jockeys."

Being Ridden

 * "Shoot this thing on my back!"
 * "Shoot this thing off my back!"
 * "Jockey on me!"
 * "Jockey! Jockey!"
 * "Kill this Jockey on me!"
 * "The Jockey's got me!"

Another Survivor being Ridden

 * Ellis: "That don't look dignified!"
 * Nick: "No, it doesn't."
 * "Ten bucks says he takes him to the right…"

Smoker
Hearing
 * "There's a Smoker around here." (2 versions)
 * "Smoker's around."
 * "I hear a Smoker."

Spotting
[Dead Center]
 * "Smoker!" (3 versions)
 * "We got a Smoker!"
 * "Tongue!"
 * "The smokin' thing!"

Grabbed
[Dead Center]
 * "Smoker's got me!"
 * "No!" (5 versions)
 * "No, no!" (2 versions)
 * "No, no, no!" (2 versions)
 * "Smoker's-...!"
 * "...got me!"
 * "Freaking tongue!?"
 * "What? Ahh, gross shit."
 * "What the hell?!"
 * "What's this shit?!"
 * "Something's got me!"

Being Choked

 * "Shoot the tongue! [grunts] Shoot--Shoot the tongue!"
 * "Smoke--Smoker's got me!"
 * "Smoker's got me!"

Hearing

 * "Spitter around."
 * "I hear a Spitter." (2 versions)
 * "There's a Spitter around." (3 versions)

Spotting
[Dead Center]
 * "Spitter." (2 versions)
 * "We got a Spitter."
 * "Green thing!"
 * "Neck!"

Spit Incoming

 * "Hot stuff coming!"
 * "We got goo coming!"
 * "Fire spit coming!" (2 versions)
 * "We got goo!" (2 versions)
 * "Goo, incoming!"
 * "It's that bug-spitting bitch!"
 * "They've been calling those things Spitters."

Spit On

 * "I got hit by burning goo shit!" (2 versions)
 * "I got hit by the burning goo shit!"
 * "Goddammit, I'm covered in goo!"
 * "Let's get out of the goo!"
 * "Get out of the goo!"

Spit On in Dead Center

 * "Ugh, what in the hell did that thing just do?!"
 * "Ugh, what is this shit on me?!"
 * "Ugh, what am I covered in?!"

Spotting

 * "Tank inbound!"
 * "Tank! TANK!"
 * "Man up, we got a Tank!"
 * "Get ready, we got a Tank!"
 * "Hold steady! Tank!"
 * "Get ready! Tank!"
 * "We got a Tank!"
 * "Tank!" (3 versions)

Spotting in Dead Center

 * "I hope that's not bulletproof." (2 versions)
 * "We are screwed." (2 versions)
 * "Maybe if we don't move, it won't see us." (2 versions)
 * "Okay, that's reason to panic." (2 versions)
 * "What in the hell sign of the apocalypse is that?" (2 versions)
 * "Holy shit! Big freakin' zombie!"  (2 versions)
 * "We have a problem!" (2 versions)

Reloading (fighting Tank)

 * "Kill the Tank!"
 * "Shoot the Tank!"
 * "Shoot the damn tank!"
 * "Shoot it! Shoot it!"
 * "Everyone shoot the Tank!"
 * "You! Shoot the Tank!"
 * "Keep shooting!"

Attacked while Incapacitated

 * "Freaking Tank is- Argh! It's killing me!"
 * "The freaking Tank is killing me!"
 * "Mother of m- Argh! This thing is killing me!"
 * "Mother of mercy, this thing is killing me!"
 * "Do you see this -Argh! This big g- Argh! This thing on me?!"
 * "Do you see this big giant thing on me?!"

Hearing
[Lights Off]
 * "I think I hear my ex-wife."
 * "Sounds like a Witch." (2 versions)
 * "I hear a Witch."
 * "Everybody hear that Witch?"
 * [Dead Center]
 * "Oh there's a sound that's familiar."
 * "That sound is familiar."
 * "I don't like the sound of this crying." (2 versions)
 * "A crying woman… What, you think she's sad the mall's closed?"
 * "A crying woman... You think she's sad the mall's closed?"
 * "Kill your light."
 * "Everybody, lights off."
 * "Lights off."

Spotting

 * "We got a witch."
 * "Witch." (2 versions)

Witch is Being Disturbed

 * "Can we leave that Witch alone?"
 * "That Witch is getting angry!"
 * "Leave the Witch alone!"
 * "Stay away from the Witch!"
 * "Watch out, that Witch is getting angry!"
 * [If Ellis is disturbing the Witch]
 * "Ellis! Leave that Witch alone!"

Witch is Startled

 * "Holy shit!"
 * "Goddammit!"
 * "Shit!"
 * "No!!!!"
 * "Bitch!"

Being Chased

 * "This bitch is chasing me!"
 * "Shoot the Witch! Shoot the Witch! Shoot the Witch! What're you doing?! Shoot her!"
 * "Shoot the Witch! Shoot the Witch! Shoot the Witch!"
 * "Ahhhh, I pissed the Witch off!" (2 versions)
 * "Witch coming! Witch coming!"

Hazmat Infected

 * "Guess those suits don't stop bites."
 * "Are those guys fireproof?"
 * "Hazmat guys!"

Jimmy Gibbs Jr.

 * "God DAMN you, Jimmy Gibbs Junior!"
 * "Holy shit!"

Fallen Survivor

 * "Is that a Survivor?!"
 * "Kill that zombie, he's got something!"
 * "Did that zombie just drop something?"
 * "That zombie dropped something!"
 * "That zombie's got something, kill it!"
 * "Get that zombie, he's got something!"
 * "That zombie just dropped something!"
 * "What's that zombie got?"
 * "What did that zombie drop?"
 * "I think that zombie dropped something!"

Clown Infected

 * "Kill the clown, he's attracting more zombies!"
 * "Kill the clown!"
 * "That squeaking is driving the zombies crazy!"
 * "Shoot the clown!"
 * "Kill every clown you see!"

Mudmen

 * "Mudders!" (3 versions)
 * "Watch out, mudmen!"

Riot infected

 * "Those zombies are wearing armor!" (2 versions, one is a question)
 * "Shoot the armored zombies in the back!"

Intro

 * "So much for the rescue, any ideas?"
 * "We're still here!"
 * "Where the hell's the copter going? We're right here!" (3 versions)
 * "Hey, get back here!" (2 versions)
 * "Goddammit, we just missed it!" (3 versions)
 * "Dammit, we just missed it."
 * "Hey, come back!"
 * "Hey, come back, I'm here! There's still someone down here!"
 * "You could've yelled if you wanted."
 * "Goddammit, they left us!"
 * "They saw us alright and they're not coming back."
 * "Not to burst your bubble sport, but this building is burning down. They're not coming back."
 * "Okay, helicopters don't come back when you yell at 'em. Now we know that." (2 versions)
 * "Good, that's decided. Moving on: I think this building's on fire, so I'd like to leave this building."
 * "Good, that's decided. Moving on: I think this building's on fire, so... I'd like to leave it."
 * "Okay. Helicopters don't come back when you yell at 'em. Valuable lesson, you three tuck that away for later. Now grab a weapon and follow me. This goddamn building's on fire."
 * "Hey! Loud girl. Hayseed. Tons of fun. This building is on FIRE. Grab a weapon and let's get the hell out of here."
 * "It's flying away from the burning building we're standing on; let's follow its lead and get the hell out of here."
 * "Okay, we all had a turn yelling at the helicopter. Good. Moving on: I think the building's on fire."
 * "Grab something; I got a feeling this isn't gonna be easy."
 * "We better arm ourselves. I hope you three know how to fight. You don't look it."
 * "If the world's goin' to hell, I'm taking a weapon."
 * "Everybody grab a weapon. I get the feeling we're gonna need 'em."
 * "Lets grab some weapons. I have a feeling something's down there..."
 * "I hope you three know how to fight—you don't look it."
 * [Responding to another Survivor]
 * "Then so am I. Grab a weapon, let's go. I think the goddamn building's on fire."
 * "Jesus, are you from here? Ugh, look at you, that is so depressing."
 * [When the group encounters the Infected]
 * "Holy shit! It's zombies!"
 * "Oh, this is unexpected."
 * "These don't look like people."
 * "Jesus Christ, what are these things?!"
 * "I don't know about you, but I'm killing these things!"
 * "Zombies, eh? I knew zombies were real."
 * [Studying the map]
 * "If that map's right, New Orleans might be the last place in America that can get us out alive."
 * "According to this map, the only place left standing is New Orleans."
 * "Jesus, the whole country's fallen."
 * "This map is NOT good news."
 * "According to this map, there aren't a whole lot of options."
 * "Looks like New Orleans is the last place on Earth that can get us out alive."
 * "Dammit, elevator's out!"
 * [When fire explodes in the hallway next to the nonfunctional elevators]
 * "Alright, I'm not walking through THAT. Let's find another way."
 * "Let's find another way. This suit's flammable."
 * "Shit! This place's burning up fast!"
 * "Get out to the ledge!"
 * "Out here, let's try the ledge!"
 * "We can use this ledge to get around the fire!"
 * "This elevator's still working!"
 * "Technically... you're not supposed to use an elevator on a fire. But that might not apply during a ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE."
 * "Everybody get in the elevator!"
 * [Everyone in the elevator]
 * "Push the button!"
 * [While in the elevator]
 * "So you guys got names, or what?"
 * "Anyone get bit? Isn't that how this works?"
 * "Well, I'm glad I got that out of the way. Now, did anyone get bit?"
 * "There's blood on me, but it ain't mine."
 * "Nice work out there."
 * "Okay, let's keep this up."
 * "I normally go solo, but under these circumstances, I'm thinking we stick together. Call me Nick. You got names?"
 * "Hey, what's your name?"
 * "Nick. Name's Nick. You all did good. What are your names?" (2 versions)
 * "Name's Nick, but don't bother learning it 'cause I ain't sticking around long."
 * "Name's Nick, but don't worry about learning it 'cause I ain't sticking around long."
 * "Name's Nick. From the looks of you three, I'm the only one here who knows how to fire a weapon."
 * "Name's Nick. I'm gonna get out of this piece-of-shit city if it kills me."
 * "Nick. That's all you need to know."
 * "Nick." (3 versions)
 * "Nick. Not that it matters, 'cuz I think we should split up when this thing opens."
 * "Name's Nick." (3 versions)
 * "I'm Nicolas... Nick."
 * "You can call me Nick." (2 versions)
 * "Hey Coach, call me Nick.
 * "Coach, you can call me Nick."
 * "Kid, the name's Nick." (2 versions)
 * [Responding to other Survivors]
 * "Hm. This would be really awkward if I gave a shit about your feelings."
 * "You did good out there Rochelle."
 * "No, I'm good." (2 versions)
 * [While in the elevator and another Survivor is dead]
 * "And then there were three."
 * "We're pretty screwed."
 * "Was it Ellis? Doesn't matter now."
 * "I think it was Coach. Don't matter now."
 * "I think she said it was Rochelle."
 * [Ready to open the elevator doors at the bottom]
 * "Get ready."
 * "I bet there's gonna be somethin' waiting for us out there, so let's get ready."
 * "Alright, we're all friends now. Get ready."
 * "Search these rooms, might be somethin' we can use."
 * "We can get through here."
 * [Preparing to jump down the elevator shaft (Unused)]
 * "Down this shaft."
 * "We can jump down the elevator shaft."
 * [Picking up a primary weapon after leaving the elevator (Unused)]
 * "Haha, now let's see who's the monster."
 * "Shotgun, you complete me."
 * "Finally, a goddamn gun."
 * "This shit'll even up the score."
 * "Whacking things in the head was fun, but..."
 * "I do love guns."
 * "I used to steal these from cops back in high school."
 * "If my friends ever saw me using a cop's gun..."
 * "Ha, that's more like it."
 * "Now we're talkin'!"
 * [Everyone in the safe room]
 * "I think we should close the door."

The Streets

 * "Sounds good to me!"
 * "A gun store sounds like a fine place to stop."
 * Nick: "I guess living here's finally paying off."
 * Coach: "Mister, I don't think I like your attitude."
 * Nick: "Whatever."
 * "Get me to the mall and I'll make it worth your while."
 * "Mall must be close."
 * "Over the dumpster."
 * "Over this dumpster."
 * [Entering Whitaker's Gun Shop]
 * "Candy store for adults!"
 * "Let's grab some guns, we got shit to shoot!"
 * "I'm not legally allowed to own a gun... hope everyone's okay with that."
 * [Talking to Whitaker before entering the Mall]
 * "So let me get this straight: we get you your shit and you'll help us get to the mall, right? Okay, you screw us, and I will kill you with your own gun."
 * "Thanks for the guns, honestly. We all appreciate it. But you better not be screwing with us."
 * "Sure. Why not?"
 * "Sir, for the use of this gun, I am willing to go get you your Cola."
 * "Get ready, this is gonna set off the alarm!"
 * "Get the Cola!"
 * "Grab the Cola!"
 * "Somebody grab the Cola!"
 * "I got his Cola, let's go!"
 * "We got it, let's go!"
 * "Got the Cola!"
 * "Barrier's down, let's get out of here!"
 * "There goes the tanker; Let's get out of here!"
 * "That's one way to open a path!"
 * "I gotta respect that!"
 * "THAT is how you clear a path!"
 * "I'll be damned. We actually made it to the mall!"
 * "Well we made it! Let's hope there's still somebody here."
 * "Okay, we made it! Let's hope there's still somebody here."
 * "Okay, we made it to the mall. Barely."

The Mall

 * "If anyone sees a men's store, let me know. I've got blood on my suit." (Possible reference to the Spy from Team Fortress 2)
 * "Let's go find the evacuation center. I'm already sick of this place."
 * "Ugh, God, I hate malls!"
 * [Upon spotting the store "Disco Pants and Hair Cuts"]
 * "Disco pants and haircuts. Man, lots of space in this mall." (Reference to The Blues Brothers)
 * "Up this escalator!"
 * "Down that escalator!"
 * "I'm get a sinking feeling this alarm's gonna get us some attention."
 * "I got a sick feeling this alarm's gonna get us some attention."
 * "Keep going up!"
 * "Up, up, keep moving!"
 * "Turn off that alarm!"
 * "We gotta turn off this alarm!"
 * "We need to turn off this alarm!"
 * "Is there some way to turn off this alarm?!"
 * "How do we turn this alarm off?"
 * "Got it."
 * "Alarm off!"
 * "Thanks for turning off that alarm!"
 * "Man, that was driving me crazy!"
 * "You know what, I can take the zombies, but not that goddamn noise!"
 * "Agh, Jesus, I knew it! There's nothing here!"
 * "Okay, so the evac station's abandoned, annnnd we're at the center of a zombie-filled building. On the bright side? We're all probably gonna die."
 * "CEDA. Leaving me twice in one day, lesson learned."
 * "No one's alive in here."
 * "We aren't getting saved!"

The Atrium

 * [Seeing Jimmy Gibbs Jr. Poster]
 * "Who the hell is Jimmy Gibbs Jr.?"
 * "I'm getting sick at looking at this guy's face!"
 * "Really? 'Cause he looks like an asshole."
 * "HELL YEAH! Next stop: New Orleans!"
 * "Hit it, Ellis!"
 * "What a fun road trip this'll be."

The Riverbank
[Alt] "Okay, listen to me, jackass, lower the goddamn bridge so we can drive our goddamn car across!" [Alt] "Bite me, Colonel Sanders!" (2 versions)
 * [Start of Campaign; talking with Francis]
 * Nick: "I'm telling you the last goddamn time: Lower the goddamn bridge, you greasy vest-wearing monkey!"
 * Francis: "Go to Hell, suit."

[Alt] "Would you lighten up?... Man, no one can take a joke anymore." [Alt] "Coach, no time for cake. I'll keep an eye out for some, okay, buddy?"
 * [In response to Francis, who states he is a cop]
 * "That guy's no cop."
 * "I'll tell ya' somethin'. That guy is no cop."
 * "So we find this historic section, go under the river, and then we kick that biker-dude's ass, right?"
 * [When talking to Zoey]
 * Zoey: "Sorry I can't lower the bridge."
 * Nick: "That's terrific, cupcake. Look, is there a man up there we can talk to?"
 * Zoey: "Boohoo, I don't know what to do... Go to Hell, Colonel Sanders!"
 * Rochelle: "I can't believe you used to be a con artist."
 * Nick: "Hey, lighten up. Man, no one can take a joke anymore."
 * [Upon seeing Foot Locker]
 * "Search these lockers!"
 * "What's in here?"
 * "Let's see what's in here!"
 * "Let's open this up."
 * "Check it out. Open it up!"
 * [Reacting to the Bride Witch]
 * "Careful. I've seen a bride just like this before."
 * Coach: "Man, I hope we don't see a Tank in a tuxedo."
 * "Wedding music, and a crying woman left at the altar. This is bringing back some bad memories."
 * "Wedding dress, crying... this brings back some bad memories."
 * "Careful... I've seen a bride just like this before."
 * "Ellis. Maybe you should grab that dress for your new girlfriend."
 * "Ah Christ, this is more depressing than zombies."
 * "Ah shit, a wedding... this is more depressing than the zombies."
 * "I hate going to weddings."
 * "It's not easy to get blood out of a wedding dress... don't ask me how I know that."
 * "I think we're a little late for this wedding."
 * [Mocking Ellis' accent]
 * "Hey, Ellis, look! It's another angel!"
 * [Upon crowning a Bride Witch]
 * "Honeymoon's over... bitch!"
 * "That has been a fantasy of mine for a long, long time."
 * "He ain't comin' back, honey."
 * "Now that's a shotgun wedding."
 * [Upon startling a Bride Witch]
 * "Here comes the bride!"
 * [Upon being attacked by a Bride Witch]
 * "This bride is killing me!"
 * [When Coach is looking for the wedding cake]
 * "Coach, no time for cake."

The Underground
[Alt] "What's the matter, sweetie? Playin' hard to get?" [Alt] "Should we wait until they finish?"
 * [Safe room]
 * "I don't have a problem with leaving the car AND you behind. Okay, Ellis?"
 * "If anybody sees any hand sanitizer, let me know."
 * Coach: "You're not scared of one little germ, are you, Nick?"
 * Nick: "One germ nearly wiped out the entire human race, so YES!"
 * [Alternate Line]
 * Rochelle: (laughs) "You're kidding, right?"
 * Nick: "Yeah, hahaha, a little more hand sanitizer and we wouldn't be in this mess."
 * "Boiled nuts? Coach, come on, what is wrong with you southerners?"
 * [Teasing Rochelle about Francis]
 * "What's the matter, Rochelle? Playin' hard to get?"
 * "I saw the way you were lookin' at him!"
 * "Look, there are probably ten guys left on the planet, Rochelle, and you aren't getting any younger, sweetie."
 * [Upon entering the tattoo parlor]
 * "Y'know, I've never done a color tattoo before..."
 * "Who wants a tattoo?"
 * "Hey Ellis, maybe you should get a tattoo of that Zoey girl on your butt."
 * "Ellis, did you get that girl's name? 'Cause I can tattoo it on your ass. She'll like that."
 * "Rochelle, do you want me to tattoo your boyfriend's name on your arm? I'll just write 'Greasy Pig', we all know who we're talking about."
 * "I'm gonna get one that says no."
 * [Upon seeing the suitcase full of guns and money]
 * "I like the way this guy packs!"
 * "Don't mind if I do."
 * [While crossing the plank several stories above ground]
 * "Let's hurry across the plank before a Smoker gets us."
 * "Watch out for Chargers."
 * "Watch out for Smokers."
 * "Over this plank."
 * "Okay, let's cross this plank, quick."
 * "Don't look down. Watch yourself on this thing."
 * "Cross quick before a Smoker grabs ya'."
 * [Upon seeing the Midnight Riders' tourbus]
 * "I must be dreaming."
 * "Did anyone else see that?!"
 * "What in the hell was that?!"
 * [Upon entering the sewers]
 * "Oh, this is some gross shit."
 * "A sewer filled with bodies! This is sanitary."
 * [After entering the water]
 * "It's just a storm sewer, it is just a STORM sewer..."
 * Ellis: "Don't smell like one."
 * Nick: "Ellis, I need this."
 * Rochelle: "Hey Nick! Splash fight?"
 * Nick: "NOOOOO!"
 * [Alt] "Don't you dare."
 * "Seriously, look, I'll give any one of ya' a thousand bucks to whoever gives me a piggyback ride." [Note: the subtitles say "dollars" but Nick says "bucks"]
 * "I am breathing shit air into my lungs. It is being absorbed into my bloodstream. I am literally full of shit."
 * "Here's a pleasant thought: Any one of us gets pounced, we're going to be fully submerged in shit water."
 * "Seriously, is nobody else freaked out right now? We are walking through a sewer."
 * "I am walking through a toilet. Thank you, Jimmy Gibbs."
 * [To self]
 * "Hey Nick, what's new? Oh, not much, I couldn't drive Jimmy Gibbs' stock car over a bridge, so I'm crawlin' through a shit-filled sewer so I can lower it. You?"
 * [In response to Ellis' comment about his suit]
 * "I hate you, Ellis!"
 * Ellis: "Well, I still like you, Nick."
 * [During the Gauntlet Crescendo]
 * "Goddammit! Back into the shit water!"
 * "Shit! Back in the toilet."
 * "Back in the water."
 * "Don't stop in the sewer!"
 * Nick: "Yeah, a tunnel. I guess you're right, Coach. History is coming alive."
 * Coach: "Shut up, Nick!"
 * Ellis: "Actually, I think it's true."
 * Coach: "Both of you, shut up!"
 * [During the tour]
 * "So... it's an antique basement, then... fantastic."
 * "Looks like the tour is in the Jazz Club."
 * "You're right, Coach, you're so right... history is coming alive."
 * "Why is everything historic always so goddamn filthy?"
 * [Upon see the "Phase Two" sign]
 * "Phase Two—does this even go through?"
 * "From one con man to another: five bucks for this? I tip my hat to you, Rayford."
 * "Jesus Christ, what did we just pay five bucks for?"
 * "Five goddamn dollars for an under the river tour. Well played, Rayford... well played."

The Port
[Alt] "Nick, you need to find a woman who hates herself. Then she'll love you." [Alt] "Nick. Leave him alone." [Alt] "A-B-C. Always be closing." (taken from Alec Baldwin's speech in Glengarry Glen Ross) [Alt] "What? I'm a closer."
 * [While in the Safe Room]
 * Nick: "So we're about to see that girl again—what's her name, Zoey?"
 * Ellis: "Okay, you know what? No need to remind me, Nick. I'm a nervous wreck over here."
 * Nick: "What are you nervous about? You had your chance, and you didn't do shit. Now, you can watch Nick take care of business."
 * Rochelle: "Nick, being one of the last two women alive, I can safely say at least half of the women in this world hate you."
 * [In response to Rochelle defending Ellis when Nick teases him about Zoey]
 * "What? I'm a handsome man."
 * "What? I'm a handsome man. What can I tell ya'?"
 * [In response to Ellis asking how he looks]
 * Nick: "Like you ran through a sewer."
 * Ellis: "Well, there's a turd on your shoulder."
 * Nick: "I'm not even gonna look."
 * "I don't trust that biker. He better still be here."
 * [In response to Rochelle, who states that Francis will still be on the bridge]
 * "You know him that well?"
 * "You got a good feeling about every scumbag that lives on a bridge?"
 * [When filling up the Generator]
 * "Why is everything always empty?"
 * "Why doesn't anything ever have enough gas in it!?"
 * [When meeting Francis for the second time]
 * Francis: "Never thought a fancy ass like you would have made it this far."
 * Nick: "That's funny, because I knew your lazy ass would still be here."
 * "I guess they'll help right? First we fill up Jimmy Gibbs' car with gas, now a generator. What next? Don't answer that, Ellis."
 * [When Francis makes a kill]
 * "I owe you one, Francis."
 * "Nice shot, Francis!"
 * [When Zoey makes a kill]
 * "Zoey!"
 * "Zoey, all right!"
 * "Nice shot, Zoey!"
 * [When Louis makes a kill]
 * "You're a badass with that gun, Louis!"
 * "Louis, I'm beginning to like you and your gun!"
 * "Hey Louis, are you sure you don't wanna come with us? We can leave Ellis behind."
 * [Picking up an item that Zoey, Francis or Louis throw down]
 * "That's what we need."
 * "Shit! Thanks!"
 * "Thanks, we'll make good use of this!"
 * "Sorry if I was rude before, you guys are all right!"
 * "Thanks pal! Got it, thank you!"
 * [To Francis]
 * "Thanks, greaseball!"
 * [To Zoey]
 * "Thanks, babe!"
 * [To Louis]
 * "Thanks, Louis!"
 * [Upon reaching Jimmy Gibbs' car]
 * "Hit it, Ellis!"
 * "I hope those three are gonna be okay!"
 * "Don't worry Ellis, plenty of fish in the sea!"
 * "Next stop: New Orleans!"
 * "Thanks guys, you good?"
 * "Thank you, good luck out there, eh?"
 * "You three take care of yourselves! And thanks, we won't forget this!"
 * "Be safe, you three!"
 * "Thanks, we gotta run!"
 * "Get to the car! Get to the car!"
 * "Thanks to you three! Good luck!"
 * "I actually think I might miss one of these guys."

The Highway
[Alt] "Goddamn you, Jimmy Gibbs Jr.!"
 * "I hate to be the bearer of bad news guys, but unless Ellis knows how to build a monster truck, we ain't driving through this.
 * Ellis: "Sorry, guys. Guess it wasn't such a hot idea after all."
 * Nick: "Don't sweat it, Ellis. At least you got us out of that mall."
 * Ellis(if Nick says Alt):"That's not cool, Nick."
 * [In response to Coach explaining he went to Whispering Oaks Amusement Park as a kid]
 * "Oh good. Now we can all die there as adults."
 * "I think our options are keep moving down the road towards those lights or die here. Anyone in the "die here" camp? No? Then let's move out."
 * [Upon seeing abandoned cars]
 * Nick: "These abandoned cars go on for miles!"
 * Coach: "Maybe they left em' when they got rescued."
 * Nick: "That's... one theory."
 * [Upon noticing the burned bodies in the pool at the motel]
 * (whistles) "Those people sucked at high diving."
 * "They're not kidding when they say no lifeguards on duty."
 * [While going down the hill]
 * "Whoa, shit!"
 * "Christ."
 * [After going down the hill, and Ellis makes a comment about going downhill being "fun"]
 * "Falling and breaking my neck is not a fun time, Ellis."

The Fairgrounds
[Alt] "You guys are jaded. I used to have his toys when I was just bite-sized. That little stuffed peanut is the best friend a boy could have." [Alt] "You're a real comedian, Nick."
 * [In the Safe Room]
 * Coach: "Hey the Midnight Riders! I used to love that band!"
 * Nick: "Never heard of 'em. They any good?"
 * Coach: "Hell yes! I have ALL their albums — even their new stuff that ain't no good! Best light show in the business, though."
 * [While looking at the Lil' Peanut cutout]
 * "I do not like that little peanut man."
 * Ellis: "Man, how can you not like Lil' Peanut? I love this little guy!"
 * "Anybody else find this peanut thing a little terrifying?"
 * [After Ellis screams "Kiddie Land"]
 * "He's like a five year old. With guns. And a comprehensive grasp of every swear word in the English language."
 * "Now I want to ride one."
 * [Before the Crescendo Event]
 * "You gotta be this tall to get in here, Ellis. Sorry, buddy. You'll be missed."
 * Ellis: " Ha Ha. Aren't you a real comedian."
 * "Nice fencing. Looks like a federal carousel penitentiary."
 * "A fenced-in carousel. Is this where they took child prisoners on day trips?"
 * Coach: "If we make this out alive, I'm taking y'all to a steak dinner."
 * Nick: "Buddy, if you get me out of this alive, I will deep-fry you an entire goddamn cow."
 * [Upon seeing the switch to the Crescendo Event]
 * "We need to turn on this power to open the gate. You know what I think it's gonna activate everything else around here."
 * [In the Safe Room]
 * "Why couldn't I have been in Vegas when the Infection hit, or even Atlantic City? Instead, I'm trapped in some goddamn hillbilly tunnel of love. Did you see that sign out front? Cousins-only day today."
 * "This is the most relaxing safe room I've ever been in!"

The Coaster
[Alt] "Ha, ha, ha."
 * [In the beginning of the Tunnel of Love]
 * Nick: You got your wish Ellis—we're in an amusement park ride."
 * Ellis: "This ain't that kind of ride, Nick. [Whispering] This is where you make out with your girlfriend."
 * Nick: Why couldn't we be in Vegas when the infection hit? Instead I'm stuck in this redneck tunnel of love. You see the sign out front? It's cousins only day.
 * [Alternate Line]
 * Nick: "Bringing back any memories, Coach? You, a cheeseburger, romance in the air..."
 * Coach: "How many tunnel of love memories YOU got, Nick?"
 * Nick: "Pfft. Huh. Several. Easy."
 * [Alternate Line]
 * Coach: Nick, I was on the football team. Coach did just fine.
 * [While moving through the Tunnel of Love]
 * "You could almost call this a cement river, Ellis!"
 * Ellis: "Yeah, very funny."
 * "Into the swan maintenance room of love!"
 * "This is the longest tunnel of love I've ever seen!"
 * "Hmm. Okay, that got us around the block."
 * [In the air duct shortcut]
 * "This isn't very romantic."
 * [While running on the coaster tracks]
 * "These Infected do NOT respect lines!"
 * "Thank God this doesn't do a loop."
 * "Just follow the tracks!"
 * "I hate roller coasters."
 * "Make sure to call out if you get pulled."

The Barns
[Alt] "Ugh! What's that smell?" [Alt] Rochelle: "Smells like... a white suit... that hasn't been dry cleaned in about a month."
 * [When viewing a dead animal in the barns]
 * "Looks like the H in 4H stands for Hell."
 * Ellis: "Smells like dead zombies. Everything's startin' to smell like that lately."/"Smells like a raccoon died in a diaper factory."

The Concert

 * [In the Safe Room, in response to Coach's plan]
 * "Coach, that is the stupidest idea I've ever agreed with"
 * "I know I'm going to regret this, but turn it up!"
 * "Okay, we'll set off the pyrotechnics, but I'm telling you right now. I AM NOT GOING TO AIR GUITAR."
 * "I think I know how to start the finale; hit the button labeled 'Finale'."
 * "When I hit this tape, it's gonna blare some old people's rock music and start the finale. Get ready."
 * "Unless someone else has a better idea, lets rock."
 * "Coach, when I start this finale, you aren't gonna start dancing are you? Ahh, screw it, I'm hitting it."
 * "If you have any taste, cover your ears. I'm starting the finale."
 * "Hit the flash bangs!"
 * "I think the copter pilot wants us to turn it down."
 * "Ellis, I'm sorry to ruin your day, but I think your heroes are lip-singers. There's a button here labeled 'Finale'."
 * Ellis: "Lots of bands lip sync. Ain't nothing wrong with saving your vocal cords for the studio."/"That don't matter. I could never hear the music over the pyrotechnics anyway."
 * "Sorry to break it to you Coach, but your heroes lip-sync. There's a tape back here labeled 'Finale'."
 * Coach: "You mock because you're jealous, Nick. These men are living legends."/"They have taped music? Shit. Old ass classic rock clowns."
 * [After seeing the helicopter]
 * "Coach, you're a genius! This worked!"
 * "It worked! I love you, Coach!"
 * "Great, following shiny lights in the sky. We're like freaking cats and a laser pointer."

Plank Country
[Alt] "I shot a zombie. He was a zombie, Ellis. He must have gotten bitten before he picked us up."
 * [In response to Ellis' reaction to him killing the pilot]
 * "Well he wasn't doing a very good job once he became a zombie, now was he?"
 * Rochelle: "That's true. If I had to pick a low point in the flight, it would probably be when he stopped flying the chopper and... attacked us. Anyone know where we are?"
 * Nick: "I can't believe none of you were going to shoot him."
 * [In response to Ellis talking about the blood farmers]
 * "Jesus Christ, Ellis, like the goddamn zombies aren't bad enough."
 * "I don't think they like the military out here."
 * "This is all messed up..."
 * [When crossing the river in Plank Country]
 * Rochelle: "Nick, what do you think the odds are that the swamp people are still alive?"
 * Nick: "What alive and Infected, or alive and not zombies?"
 * Rochelle: "Not zombies."
 * Nick: "100 to 1."
 * Rochelle: "Sounds about right."
 * [When jumping into deep water]
 * Nick: "Shit! All this swamp is gonna ruin my white suit!"
 * Rochelle: (laughs) "You mean the one with zombie brains all over it? That one?"
 * Nick: "Brains come out, swamp water doesn't. Don't ask me how I know that."

The Swamp

 * [When seeing the downed passenger jet]
 * "I guess walking isn't so bad."
 * [Before triggering the emergency door in the jet]
 * "We can get through this door."
 * "I think it's a safe bet to say an alarm will sound when we open this door."
 * "We have to open this door."
 * "Someone open the door."
 * "The emergency exit is the only way."
 * [When opening the door]
 * "I'm opening the door."
 * "Get ready, I'm opening the door."
 * [When low on Health]
 * "I am not dying in this goddamn swamp."
 * "I am not going to become gator food..."
 * Rochelle: "So what do you think is going to kill us? Gators, snakes, bugs, or mud people?
 * Nick: You're forgetting one thing—from the way we're shooting? Each other."

The Milltown
[Seeing the sign at the first gas station]
 * "What are we supposed to signal him with?"
 * Ellis: "Oh, there's flares in the gun bag."
 * Nick: "What gun bag?
 * Ellis: "You didn't grab the guns?
 * Nick: "ME? Who died and made me the gun monitor?
 * Ellis: "Pretty much everybody."
 * Rochelle: "This should be easy. We just need to grab some diesel."
 * Nick: You wanna hear a prediction?"
 * Everyone in synchronization: "No."
 * Nick: "There's not gonna be any gas. Watch."
 * "No gas. See? What'd I say?"
 * [Alt] "No gas. Terrific, this is just great."
 * "Out of gas!"
 * Ellis: "Looks like we gotta head to this Ducatel place."
 * Nick: "What makes you think they still have gas?"
 * Coach: "'Cause if they don't, we're gonna be stuck here forever, Nick."

The Sugar Mill

 * "The last time I saw this many crying women was at my wedding."
 * "DAMN! There are so many witches!" [Nick laughs] "I bet they all cry because I dumped them all."

Mill Escape

 * "Back through the field."
 * "Everybody in the elevator!"
 * "We can take the elevator back up!"
 * "Up that/this pipe!"
 * "Everyone back down the stairs."
 * "We can cross over that tank!"
 * "We can get across the water here/there!"
 * "Cross here!"
 * "Man, it's all flooded!"
 * "It's a lake down there!"
 * "There's the Ducatel sign, we're almost out of here!"

Return to Town

 * "I remember this, we're going the right way!" (2 versions)
 * "I saw this on the way in, we're going the right way!" (2 versions)
 * "Get to higher ground!"
 * "Here comes the rain!"
 * "Storm coming!"
 * "Stay close!"
 * "I can't see a damn thing!"
 * "Blind as a damn bat!"

Town Escape

 * [Unused Lines]
 * "The sign's out!"
 * "Somebody restart the sign!"

The Waterfront
[Alt] "Yeah, well, seeing the bridge and getting there are two different things."
 * "I... have not... come this far... to die now."
 * [When the fighter jets fly by]
 * Coach: "Alright! The military's still here!"
 * Nick: "You don't evacuate people in fighter jets."
 * [Alternative when the fighter jets fly by]
 * Coach: "They still flyin' jets!"
 * Nick: "I wonder if that's a good news."
 * Coach: "It means they haven't abandoned N'awlins."
 * [In response to Coach saying how close they are to the bridge]
 * "You mean that blurry line in the horizon? Let's not get ahead of ourselves."
 * [Unused Lines]
 * "All we have to do is find the freeway, it'll take us to the bridge."
 * "Let's head inland."
 * "Let's get off the dock."
 * "Woah... military's still here."
 * "I kinda remember the city a little different."
 * "I was hoping the city'd be in better shape."
 * "Looks like they're still holding on to the city."
 * "The city is a mess!"
 * "This used to be a beautiful city."

The Park
[Alt] "Goddammit, you are messed up." [Alt] "Hooey, why we headin' there?" [Alt] "Wait... we are going it together right?"
 * [Response to Ellis' horse comment]
 * Nick: "You ever eat horse? It's tasty."
 * Ellis: "Horses are for ridin', not eatin', Nick."
 * "From the looks of this park, I'm glad we didn't arrive early."
 * "In this courtyard."
 * "Through the park."
 * [Upon seeing the bathrooms]
 * "Oh man, it smells awful in here."
 * "It reeks like... piss."
 * Ellis: "I think it smells kinda nice.
 * Nick: "You're screwed up in the head, you know that?"
 * [Upon seeing uninfected dead bodies]
 * Nick: "Jesus! These are people! They were shooting people! I told you I had a bad feeling about this."
 * [Alternate Lines] "These bodies are not infected."
 * "They made them prove they were healthy enough to walk that far..."
 * Coach: "How's it feel to be so right, Nick?"
 * Nick: "Not good..."
 * [Before starting The Park's Crescendo Event]
 * Nick: "As soon as we open that door, get ready to run for the tower."
 * Ellis: "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait... why we goin' to the tower?"
 * Nick: "We run to the tower, and we turn off the alarm!"
 * Ellis: "Oh! Okay, okay, I get it!"
 * Nick: "Of course we're going together."
 * [Alternate Line]
 * Nick: "As soon as that door opens, get ready to run for the tower."
 * Coach: "Got to agree with that."
 * [Upon starting The Park's Crescendo Event]
 * "And... let's go, let's go!"
 * "And... let's go, let's go, let's go!"
 * "Run to the tower!"
 * "Somebody's gotta turn off the alarm!"
 * "Turn off the alarm!"
 * [Upon reaching the gun table halfway through the Crescendo]
 * "Grab a gun!"
 * "Better guns!"
 * [Turning off the alarm]
 * "Alarm is off!"
 * "Off!"
 * "I got it!"
 * "Jesus, it was open season on everything out here."
 * [Upon taking a Nightstick from a dead Riot Infected]
 * "I used to steal these from cops back in high school."
 * "If my friends ever saw me usin' a cop's gun..."
 * [Unused Line]
 * "Looks like the military took over."

The Cemetery

 * "There's the freeway."
 * "Anybody see an on ramp?"
 * "We can get to it through here."
 * "Freeway."
 * [Response to Ellis' fear of ghosts]
 * "Ellis, you're carrying, like ten different guns."
 * [Upon seeing the hash marks on the barricaded bedroom wall]
 * "Does this guy's scorecard mean what I think it means?"
 * "You think he was keeping track of zombies?"
 * [Upon entering the Impound Lot]
 * "O-ho-ho-ho-ho, watch where you shoot!"
 * "Careful, carrrefullll..."
 * "You have GOT to be kidding me!"
 * "Do not shoot any of the cars!"
 * "What a nightmare."
 * [If more than one car is shot]
 * How many of those cars are you gonna shoot?!
 * "If you wanna shoot cars, let's shoot cars!"
 * [After reaching the freeway after the impound lot]
 * "Hey, I think we're gonna make it!"
 * "We made it, I can't believe we actually made it!"
 * "Finally up to the freeway."
 * "Get up here, get up here!"
 * [Fighter jets blow up the freeway]
 * "OH, COME ON!"
 * "What the f-!"
 * "What the hell are they doing!?"
 * "Everybody ok?"
 * "Was that aimed at us?"
 * "Guess it's back off the freeway."
 * [In response to Coach saying not to panic]
 * "You sure we shouldn't we just panic? I mean, I think panic was invented for just this sort of situation!"
 * [If Nick was the first one to get out or the only one to get to the freeway after the bombs drop]
 * "They're blowing this bridge to cover a retreat, now if we wanna come with them we better hurry"
 * [Unused Lines]
 * "It's a goddamn maze!"
 * "Which way?"

The Quarter
[Alt] "Well, it's official. They're trying to kill US now."
 * [Upon seeing The Parade]
 * "Look, Ellis! A tractor."
 * "Looks like our milk run just became a marathon."
 * "Someone start the tractor."
 * "We can use that float to get across."
 * "You know what? We can use that float to get across."
 * [When the tractor is in place]
 * "Our ride's here!"
 * [Upon entering the sewers]
 * "I am not going in the se— Ah screw it! Let's go."
 * "Oh Christ, not the sewer."
 * "Ugh. What's that SMELL?"
 * [In The Quarter's Safe Room, as bombs are being dropped]
 * "Christ, those guys are such assholes."
 * "Looks like they've run out of bridges to bomb."
 * "The bridge!"
 * "We can get up to the bridge deck through here."
 * [Unused lines]
 * "If things were different, I could really enjoy this place."
 * "We have to find the bridge again!"
 * "God, I love pool."
 * "Ok, anybody up for a game?"

The Bridge

 * [In The Bridge's Safe Room]
 * Nick: "Before we run across this bridge right toward the people who've been dropping bombs on us, anyone wanna talk about a Plan B?"
 * Ellis: "I don't."
 * Coach: "No."
 * Nick: "Alright then, let's go."
 * [Unused Line]
 * "Ok, so we're on the wrong side of the river."
 * [Alternate Line]
 * Coach: "Alright, alright, alright. We're gonna stroll across that bridge, and the army's gonna take care of us."
 * Nick: "Or, they're gonna line us up against the wall, and shoot us."
 * Coach: "Well, you're free to make yourself a new life right here in this room, Nick."
 * Nick: "Okay, alright, let's go."
 * "Safety's on the other side of this bridge."
 * "Let's lower that bridge."
 * "I'm hitting it. Get ready!"
 * [Responding to the military on the radio]
 * "Hello?"
 * "Ok, we're heading over now!"
 * "Watch out for the hole!"
 * "Watch out for Chargers on these ledges!" (2 versions)
 * "Keep moving across the bridge!"
 * "Watch your step."
 * "Don't let the Tank punch you off the bridge."
 * "Watch out for cars."
 * "Don't get punched off!"
 * "Get on top of the truck!"
 * [When seeing the helicopter at finale]
 * "To the chopper!"
 * "Get to the chopper!"
 * "Chopper's starting, let's go!"
 * [Unused Lines]
 * "Argh! Don't destroy the bridge!"
 * "They're blowing up the bridge!"
 * "We're on the bridge!" (2 versions)
 * "Woah! We're on the bridge!"
 * "We are on the bridge."
 * "Stop! We're on the bridge!"
 * "Chopper looks fixed, let's go!"
 * [In response to a question about why the bridge is being destroyed]
 * "To stop the zombies from crossing."
 * "To stop the zombies!"

Friendly Fire

 * "Are you really gonna shoot the guy in a $3,000 suit? Come on!"
 * "Are you really gonna shoot a guy in a $3,000 suit? Come on!"
 * "You know, it's not alright you are shooting me!"
 * "Never shoot me again!"
 * "Do not shoot me!"
 * "You are shooting me!" (2 versions)
 * "Well thank you for ventilating my suit."
 * "Why would you think shooting me is a good idea?"
 * "Let's try shooting zombies instead of people, okay?"
 * "You wanna watch where you're shooting?"
 * "Damn! ...You suck at shooting."
 * "You do not want to be shooting me."
 * "Shoot me again, and I'll drop ya'."
 * "You shoot me again, and I will drop you."
 * "Shoot me again. Shoot me again, I dare ya'."
 * "Stop shooting me!" (3 versions)
 * "Stop - Shooting me, doesn't get us, anywhere!"
 * "You do that again and I will bury you alive."
 * "Can we not shoot each other, please?"
 * "Can you stop shooting me?"
 * "Can we stop shooting each other?" (2 versions)
 * "Question: Can we not shoot each other?"
 * "Can we not shoot each other?" (2 versions)
 * "I don't know who started this shit, 'kay? But let's just stop the friendly fire right now."
 * "I don't know who started this shit, but let's just stop the friendly fire right now, 'kay?"
 * "Let's not mess this up by shooting each other, okay?"
 * "Unless you want to be picking your teeth up off the floor, stop shooting me."
 * "Stop shooting each other!"
 * "I don't wanna hear any excuses, just stop shooting me!"
 * "You do realize that you're shooting me right?"
 * "You're shooting me again!"
 * "Don't shoot each other!"
 * [When The Tank is Nearby]
 * "NOT ME! SHOOT THE TANK!"
 * "Hey, shoot the TANK!"
 * "Agh, the TANK!"
 * "The Tank, hotshot! Shoot the Tank!"
 * "It's 12 ft tall, 6 ft wide. How are you shooting me?"
 * "It's the size of a truck, how are you missing?"
 * "Come on, shoot the TANK! Not me!"
 * [Accused of Friendly Fire]
 * "If you'd looked out, you wouldn't get hit!"

Shot by Ellis

 * "DUMBSHIT!"
 * [Mocking Ellis]
 * "Y'all wanna stop shooting me?"
 * "Jesus Christ, Ellis, like the goddamn zombies aren't bad enough."
 * "Christ, Ellis, as if the zombies aren't bad enough."
 * "Ellis, come on man!"
 * "Hey, sport? Watch where you're shooting."

Shot by Coach

 * "Coach, c'mon."
 * "Coach, don't shoot me!"

Shot by Rochelle

 * "Sweetheart? Don't shoot me."
 * "Rochelle!" (2 versions)
 * "Ro! Just, just stop, okay."

Scavenge

 * [At the beginning of Scavenge Mode]
 * "Let's get some gas."
 * [Pouring gas into the tank]
 * "Come on... Come-onnn..."
 * "Piece of shit gas, GET IN THE CAR!"
 * "How big is the tank in this thing?"
 * "Get. In. The. Tank!"
 * "Hurry up... hurry up..."
 * [After winning a Scavenge Match]
 * "We're makin' it look easy!"

Badwater Basin

 * "We have to push what?" (2 versions)

Cold-theme line

 * "Goddamn, it's cold."
 * "Storm isn't gonna give up."
 * "Ellis, we're not gonna have a snowball fight."
 * "Ellis, don't look like you're having fun."

Train-theme lines

 * "We need to get to the train station."
 * "Hey, Ellis! Whoop whoop!"
 * "All aboard, whoop whoop!"

Unused
These quotes appear in the game files but are not used in-game


 * [Hearing a Special Infected]
 * "Is someone beating a horse?"
 * "What is that, is somebody beating a horse or what?"
 * "What the hell is that noise?"
 * "You hear that? I guess zombies weren't bad enough."
 * "You hear that?"
 * "Can you hear that?"
 * "What is that noise?"
 * "I have no idea what that noise is."
 * "Eh, something we're gonna have to kill."
 * [Upon joining a game]
 * "Hello." (3 versions)
 * "Y'ello."
 * "I'm here."
 * "Ok, I'm here."
 * "We're all here."
 * (Used if he is the 4th Survivor to join)
 * [Listed under lines for The Hotel, likely in response to caged Special Infected]
 * "Hey, football man, is this a relative of yours?"
 * "What's this thing in a cage?"
 * "How'd they have this in a cage already?"
 * "Did they know this was coming?"
 * "Look at that thing!"
 * "So that's a Charger, huh? I think he worked out that arm plenty, he should move on to back and legs."
 * "So that's a Charger, huh? You know what they say about zombies with one big arm."
 * "So that's a Jockey, huh? Cute little guy."
 * "So that's a Spitter, huh? Think she's single?"
 * "So that's a Boomer, huh? Y'know, it's sad to see an eating disorder get out of control like that."
 * "So that's a Hunter, huh? What's he gonna do, go for a jog at me?"
 * "So that's a Smoker, huh? Bet he's popular with the lady zombies."
 * "So that's a Tank, huh? Jesus, that thing is huge."
 * "You know how many germs are on that thing?" (2 versions)
 * "Ugh, it's like rotten eggs here. Does nobody else smell that?"
 * "Ugh, what's that smell?"
 * "Are we busting out or in?"
 * "Over the bus!"
 * "Zombies didn't take down this helicopter."
 * "Oh, this is cosy."
 * "Well this is bad."
 * "Yes, I do know why they bury them above ground."
 * "The city of the dead."
 * "Well thank God for small favors."
 * "Your mom's car." (2 versions)
 * "To the shipyard!"
 * "I love doing that."
 * "I will never get tired of that."
 * "I'll never get tired of that."
 * "Crumbs? Really Coach, that's how you swear?"
 * "Fifty beds in one room? What a shitty hotel."
 * The boardwalk still smells like popcorn and this back alley still stinks like piss. [Possibly Dark Carnival]
 * Of course it's full of zombies. The whole god damn world is full of zombies. See you in a few minutes. [Possibly used in conversation with military at bridge]
 * You know what I like best about your stories, Ellis? The sound they make when they stop.
 * "Because all you think about is ribs, Coach."
 * I trust you. You look like a man who knows his donuts.
 * HELICOPTER. It is a HELICOPTER. You call that thing a 'whirly-bird' one more time, I'll beat you SO bad, your sister's gonna wish she never gave birth to you. [Unused line from start of The Hotel in Dead Center campaign]
 * Crumbs? Really, Coach? That's how you swear? [Unused line from The Hotel]
 * No, Ellis, I've never seen anything like this. [Unused line from Atrium Finale, just before Survivors get into elevator]
 * Hm. This'd be really awkward if I gave a shit about your feelings.
 * Hey Ellis, you like taters?
 * And we're gonna have to destroy this rubble pile.
 * And we're gonna have to destroy this gate.
 * Whoa! The walkway broke! [This line was likely used in the beta versions of the game where sometimes the walkways in the swamp would break]
 * Let's use the monorail to get over that fence. [An unused Dark Carnival line from early The Coaster map]
 * Somebody's in the control room!
 * Hey, let us in!
 * Open up.
 * Don't make us shoot our way into the control room.
 * Open the door now, you can drive and we'll all ride shotgun.
 * Come on, man, help us.
 * Are you going to help us out?
 * What are you, an unfriendly hippie? I thought you all had to be friendly?
 * Is there any way I could talk you into helping us?
 * Okay, maybe we can help you. Ellis here is a mechanic.
 * No one else is alive here, okay? There's gotta be some sort of deal we can work out.
 * Just name it. Anything.
 * I am going to regret saying this, but sure. What do you need?
 * Okay, okay that's a start. What do you need?
 * Why don't you just call for help now?
 * Okay, fine, we'll put on the finale show.
 * Okay, we'll do it. Sure.
 * Why in the hell not, yes we'll do it.
 * Wow, yeah. That's really cool. I'm sure Dusty will be honored.
 * I bet he's got a working shower in there and he isn't using it.
 * Always a stinking hippie. I swear to god, it always come back to making a stinking hippie happy.
 * I don't think we have a choice.
 * There better be gas in that tour bus.
 * For once, I wish we would have just stumbled onto some cops.
 * There's the bus!
 * There's the tour bus! Get into the garage!
 * Get to the garage!
 * He kept his word! Let's go!
 * Into the garage!
 * Garage is open!
 * Just go, just go, he isn't coming with us.
 * Goodbye, my hippie friend!
 * Goodbye, Mr. Hippie!
 * We can jump down the elevator shaft!
 * Down this shaft!
 * ASS! Haaaaaaaaaaa!!!
 * "One time, one time!"
 * "Things could be worse."